


The Physiology of Tutoring

by UglyGreenJacket



Category: Bishoujo Senshi Sailor Moon | Pretty Guardian Sailor Moon
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - High School, F/M, High School, Pining, Romance, Tutoring, Unrequited Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-02
Updated: 2017-07-03
Packaged: 2018-11-08 02:52:01
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 9
Words: 24,959
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11072553
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/UglyGreenJacket/pseuds/UglyGreenJacket
Summary: AU When Mamoru is hired to tutor his fellow classmate, Usagi, sparks fly, tensions, rise and nothing academic gets learned.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> AN: Hey there! Welcome to my second multi-chapter work! And this one is being written around a prompt from my dear friend FloraOne, who also happens to be the BEST beta/friend out there. This will be rated M for later chapters, so you'll have to bear with me for a few chapters before the 'fun' begins ;) Enjoy and please, please, please review!
> 
> Oh, yeah, and I don't own Sailor Moon.
> 
> Prompt: One mutual pining High School AU where Mamoru tutors Usagi, please <3

He could remember the exact moment he'd realized he was in love with her. It wasn't some earth-shattering, over the top moment. It was simple, subtle, but it had been everything to him.

Sitting across from her at the fruit parlor in a booth crowded with their mutual friends, he had watched her as she twirled her milkshake straw around in her fingers, as she smiled at the friend nearest to her, enraptured by whatever story was being told. And that was when he had known.

That was when Chiba Mamoru had realized that he was in love with Tsukino Usagi.

Just that simple smile was what had done him in. He didn't know why he was truly seeing this for the first time, now. Mamoru had felt strange feelings towards the girl that he pushed down because he had a girlfriend. It wasn't right. But all it had taken was one, small, breathtakingly beautiful smile.

Feeling a hand on his arm, he had turned towards the intrusion. Rei, who had been his girlfriend at the time, was looking at him with concern. "Are you alright? You got really pale all of a sudden."

He stumbled over his words, "Uh...yeah I-I'm just not feeling well. I think I may head home."

"Do you want me to walk you?"

"No!" he had replied a little too forcefully, and visibly blanched at his mistake. "No, there's no need, I'll be fine. I'll call you later," he had told her as he shakily made his way to the door.

As he left, he heard her voice with what he could have sworn was a hint of worry, "Is he ok? What's wrong?" Did she care for him, too? He needed a cold shower.

Standing under a steady stream of cold water in the safety of his apartment, Mamoru had allowed his mind to wander over the relationship, or lack thereof, that he had with Usagi.

They had met the year before, both students at Juuban Municipal High School. He was in his second year, and Usagi in her first, had carelessly thrown a test paper over her shoulder, hitting him square in the face.

After recovering from the initial hit, he had briefly studied the girl from behind. Short, blonde and were those…?

"Hey, Odango Atama, you should really watch where you throw your failed test papers. People might start to think there's nothing between those buns of yours, except empty space," he'd thrown the insult at her, still slightly annoyed about being hit in the face.

She'd spun around on her heels, a furious crease on her brow, but all annoyance fell away from him when he saw her face.

She was beautiful.

A heart-shaped face, endless blonde hair, flawless skin and the most captivating pair of blue eyes he'd ever seen.

If Mamoru hadn't been an expert at hiding his emotions, he would have given away his immediate attraction to the slip of a girl in front of him. But after years of living alone, he'd become a master of masking what he was feeling.

He shook himself from his musings when he realized she was yelling at him.

"...and just because you're older than me, doesn't give you the right to treat me like I'm an idiot, you arrogant jerk! And would you please wipe that smirk off your face?!"

His "smirk" had only grown wider, as he began to walk away from her, "Sorry, Odango. No can do. The rest of the female population of this school would suffer too greatly."

"SERIOUSLY?!" Mamoru had heard her yell as he walked off, and he laughed to himself.

They'd largely ignored each other after their initial encounter, but he couldn't help the occasional, ok, practically daily, jab at her. He learned value information from their bickering!

For instance, after calling her Odango Atama a number of times, she'd begun to yell at him, "My name is USAGI. U-SA-GI. It's not that hard, baka!"

And somewhere along the line, she had managed to learn his name, too, because instead of her usual, "jerk" or, "ass" he'd become strictly, "Mamoru-baka."

Things hadn't really gotten complicated until one October afternoon, when Mamoru had run into Usagi and her normal gaggle of friends. But there had been one girl he hadn't seen before, a pretty girl with black hair and striking violet eyes.

This new girl had been immediately smitten with him, introducing herself as, "Hino, Rei." She had a sweet disposition and seemed like a genuinely nice girl. As an added bonus, Mamoru had really enjoyed the way Usagi's ears changed to the color of tomatoes, as she watched them interact with each other.

So, partially because he had been intrigued by Rei and mostly because he'd enjoyed annoying Usagi, he had asked Rei out.

Mamoru had enjoyed her company immensely. They were very much alike in a number of ways; aloof, slow to trust, independent, and it felt like it should be a natural match.

But there had been a natural consequence to dating Rei that he hadn't really thought through. Usagi was around. A lot.

Not that he minded, but he began to see things in her that he hadn't before. Like how she instantly made everyone around her feel invited and important. Or how her face would light up whenever she saw a friend, or heard a piece of good news.

Mamoru had always known she was beautiful, even a blind man could see that, but as he spent more and more time around her, she had morphed from being this pretty, younger girl who he liked to annoy, to an extraordinarily beautiful person.

But in the midst of this newfound discovery, he had felt an overwhelming guilt. Rei had done nothing to deserve being emotionally cheated on by him, so he had resolved to put Usagi out of his mind.

He would be lying, however, if he didn't admit he had been incredibly relieved when Rei approached him one day, asking to talk.

She had sat him down, explaining that she felt they were better off as friends. How she loved him dearly, but more as a brother, and while she hoped they could hang onto that and be friends, she just didn't feel like they should continue to date.

"You're a really special girl, Rei," he'd told her, "I completely respect what you're saying, and I'll miss seeing you everyday."

So, they had parted ways amicably, still meeting up for coffee on a weekly basis, to hear about the changes in each other's lives. But not dating Rei meant seeing much less of a certain bubbly blonde he'd fallen so hard for.

He did get to see her off and on when he was working on projects with a good friend of Usagi's, Mizuno Ami, a girl with striking blue hair and a startling intelligence. Usagi would come by the classroom they were working in after school to pick Ami up for their walk home. She had mostly ignored him during these times, but there were rare days when he was rewarded with a smile as she dragged Ami out of the room.

Both he and Ami were focusing on the sciences during their time at Juuban High, and since he was fairly certain she was smarter than him, Mamoru always loved when she approached him with new project ideas.

So, when Ami had come to him a few months before, excitedly showing him an article about a youth science contest that was being sponsored by the Japan Society for the Promotion of Science with a scholarship priced at two million yen, they got to work.

Poor Mamoru had no idea the predicament he was about to find himself in.

oOo

Usagi trailed behind her father, dragging her feet slightly, while gazing upon numerous booths filled with science research that she could never hope to understand, nor did she have the desire to. She was only here to support Ami, which came with the unfortunate side effect of having to spend the entire evening with her father.

Tsukino Kenji was covering the youth science competition for the Tokyo Times, and Usagi was getting a certain level of entertainment from watching him stop to "read" one of the projects. He'd place a hand on his chin, as if pondering the information in front of him, and would occasionally make sounds of, "hmmm," or, "ahhh," causing Usagi to have to stifle a giggle.

As the two made their way around the room, Usagi couldn't help her mind from wandering to the person that filled most of her thoughts these days, none other than Ami's project partner, Chiba Mamoru.

She just didn't get him. How everyone fawned over him like he was God's gift to everything. How he seemed to have his own fanclub of girls that followed him around constantly. Or why, oh, why, he felt the need to tease her so much? Why had he chosen her?

But perhaps the most frustrating thing about it all, was that she couldn't bring herself to hate him. She had tried. Hard. But there was something about him, that she couldn't place her finger on, that made her heart flutter every time he was near her, and she liked it. Heart, you stupid traitor, she'd think to herself.

When she and her father came up to Ami and Mamoru's project, Usagi waved excitedly at her blue-haired friend. Ami waved politely back, as they approached, nudging Mamoru, who was standing next to her, gazing off into the space of the project next to theirs, to warn him of his impending doom.

"Ami!" Usagi cried excitedly, "This is so exciting for you! Have you heard any results yet?"

Unable to keep the smile off her face, Ami answered, "No, not quite yet, but we're fairly certain we'll at least finish in the top three. The judges came by just a little while ago for their final walk through, and they seemed to linger here longer than anywhere else."

"Well," Usagi continued, "I'm sure you have this one in the bag. You and…," she had to remind herself to simply call him by his given name, "...Mamoru are geniuses. There's no way you won't win!"

Kenji had been surveying the elaborate poster board that contained the research Mamoru and Ami had done, thinking to himself that it certainly was the most impressive looking he'd seen that night.

He heard Ami's soft voice saying his name, "It's nice to see you, Tsukino-san. May I introduce you to my project partner? This is Chiba Mamoru. He's a third year at Juuban, emphasizing in science as I am."

"Tsukino-san," Mamoru bowed low.

Kenji laughed at the sight he made, slapping his shoulder in jest, "There's no need for that, son!"

Usagi could sense Mamoru's discomfort at her father's openness, and for some reason she found herself wanting to somehow bring a smile back to his face. Damn you, heart!

"Papa," she cut in, "have you heard what Ami and Mamoru did their research on?"

"Well, I did glance over it...but why don't you tell me about it anyway," he scratched the back of his neck nervously, laughing.

Always eager to talk about her work, Ami dove in, explaining that she and Mamoru had created software that could help to better predict which medicines would be needed to fight the flu each year. The current system took nearly a decade to predict, and could prove completely ineffective if the predictions proved to be wrong.

Even Usagi was thoroughly impressed at what the two had done. It seemed like this project could be of real value to potentially millions of people.

"My, my," Kenji said when Ami was finished with her explanation. "That is certainly something."

He turned his attention over to Mamoru, "Since your topic is medically based, are you, perhaps interested in becoming a doctor like Ami?"

UsagI eyed her father warily. He was up to something. Never had he been so interested in a male classmate's interests, academic or otherwise…

Mamoru was a bit startled at being asked a question by Kenji. "Uh...well, yes, sir, that is my hope. Anatomy and physiology were always strong suits of mine."

Kenji's eyes lit up like a Christmas tree. Jackpot. "You don't say…," he paused and then turned to his daughter with all the nonchalance he could muster, "...is that the class you're having a hard time in right now, Usagi?"

She glared at him. "It depends on your definition of, 'hard time'", she ground out through her teeth, thoroughly embarrassed at her father bringing up her shortcomings in front of Mamoru of all people.

Kenji continued, completely unphased, "I think failing counts as a hard time, honey! Do you get good grades, son?" he turned his attention back to Mamoru.

"...yes," came the hesitant reply.

The Christmas tree lit up once more, "Would you be interested in tutoring my daughter?"

Usagi's mouth dropped open, and a strangled sound came out of her mouth, "Papa!"

Kenji looked at Mamoru expectantly, while Mamoru's eyes darted to Usagi. A shiver ran down her spine at the intensity of his eyes. Was he trying to read what she wanted in her face? When he frowned, Usagi wondered what had caused this change of expression.

"Well, sir, I am pretty busy with school and extracurriculars, so, I don't know that I'd be able to come to your house to tutor…." Oh, of course, Usagi thought to herself. Why would he want to tutor me?

Usagi, while still offended at the notion that Mamoru wouldn't want to tutor her, breathed a momentary sigh of relief at Mamoru's response. Only to have her hopes dashed, when her father resorted to begging.

"Oh, that's not a problem! Usagi can come over to your place. It'd probably be much quieter than our house anyway. I'll pay you handsomely," Kenji emphasized the last word in a way that made it sound like they were about to engage in some kind of illegal activity.

Usagi looked at Mamoru, eyes pleading with him to make it stop, and he seemed to understand, offering, "Why couldn't Ami tutor Usagi? She's probably more capable than I am."

This was the absolute wrong thing to say. Usagi threw up her hands in disgust, and looked at Ami, whose eyes were wide with terror at being brought into the fray.

Kenji looked on sheepishly, responding, "Eh...we uh...already tried that. Please say you'll help out my Usagi. She's really not so bad when you get to know her!"

Usagi's eyes seemed to scream 'NO' as Mamoru shrugged in defeat. He was out of excuses, and her head hung down with a loud groan. "Eh...Sure, Tsukino-san. I'd be happy to help Usagi."

Kenji's Christmas tree was back for one last performance, his hands clapping together with glee, "Great! How would Tuesday and Friday at 6 work for you?"

"That'd be fine," Mamoru managed to mumble out.

With Mamoru's words Usagi felt her heart drop. He didn't seem excited about the prospect of her company at all. She could practically hear his teeth clenching in disgust.

Her fate was sealed, it seemed. She'd be spending at least two hours a week talking about body parts with the devil, who cared nothing for her. It didn't get any worse than this.

And her traitorous heart refused to shut up.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, hello there, dear readers! I'm in a giving mood this weekend, so here's the second chapter of this fun little story. It is still rated M, I promise you'll know why we it gets here ;) but this is a slow burning thing, and it's going to take a little time, so just bear with me!
> 
> A even bigger thanks than normal to FloraOne, who not only gave me the prompt for this story, but also brainstormed plot with me, and held my hand through writing a scene with so many characters whose personalities all have to come through. This story is what it is because of her 3
> 
> The next chapter will be out sometime next week, but in the meantime, I hope you enjoy, and I love your feedback and comments!

Mamoru stood, staring at himself in the bathroom mirror. It was 5:55pm. Usagi would be here any second. The girl he was head over heels in love with would be in his apartment, any second. He was not emotionally prepared for this.

Turning the sink on, he splashed cold water on his face, shaking his head to try and clear the thoughts racing around his mind. 5:57pm. Oh, God…

Upon leaving the bathroom, Mamoru paced the living room attempting to find any dust particle that had escaped his weekly scrubbing. Of course, there were none. He kept his apartment immaculately clean, immaculately decorated and immaculately devoid of any warmth.

He sat down on the couch with a loud sigh, running his hands through his hair, as he often did when he was nervous. It was 6:00 o’clock. She should be there by now. Mamoru began to worry.

What if something had happened to her? Had she been attacked? Should he go look for her? 

But then his brain settled on the more likely scenario. Usagi just wasn’t coming. And why would she?

From her reaction to her father’s pleas the week before, Mamoru knew she didn’t want to be tutored by him, probably didn’t even want to be around him. His heart sank with the thought of it.

He hadn’t said yes for the money. There were few things in the world Mamoru cared about less than money. He had, obviously, agreed to tutor her because it was a chance to be around her. To be able have a reason to sit in her presence and soak in everything that she was. But the horrified look on her face had almost made him regret his decision. Almost.

Spending time with Usagi could never be a bad thing, he'd decided, even if she did loathe him, didn't see him as anything other than an annoying upperclassmen. He would take it….even if she hated every second of it. And if she never loved him back, which he was convinced she never would, he would love her enough for the both of them. Plus, if her grades improved as a consequence, it wasn’t exactly like he was taking advantage of the situation, right? 

But as the minutes ticked away past six, he became more and more convinced she wasn’t coming. 

At 6:18, Mamoru had all but given up. As he rose to go to his bedroom to read for the rest of the night, he heard a faint knock on the door. It was so soft, it was almost as if the person on the other side had hoped it wouldn’t be heard. 

Must be Usagi.

Mamoru walked toward the door, taking a deep breath to steady himself. Slowly opening the door, he found a very tense looking Usagi on the other side.

“How nice of you to grace me with your presence, Odango,” he deadpanned.

“Shut up, Mamoru-baka. I got lost on the way here,” she replied, a deep frown on her face as she pushed past him to come inside.

“Why am I not surprised?” A smirk made it’s way onto his face.

“You’re an ass, you know that?” Usagi stood, glaring at him with her hands on her hips.

“At your service, mi’lady,” Mamoru bowed to her deeply, the teasing evident in his voice.

“Ooooo, you are so annoying! I knew this was going to be a disaster.” The frown had disappeared from Usagi’s face, and had been replaced by a look of....affection? No, that couldn’t possibly be it. It was time to steer this in another direction, before he convinced himself it was possible she might feel the same way he did.

“Odango, go get your homework out, while I get us something to drink. Would you like a soda?” he asked, grinning as her eyes immediately lit up, and her head nodded enthusiastically. “Alright, I’ll be right back. Uh...make yourself at home.”

As soon as he was out of Usagi’s line of sight, he closed his eyes and breathed in deeply. She was there. She had come. He had never known it was possible to be so relieved and terrified at the same time. But then again, Usagi messed with his emotions more than anyone ever had. This new feeling shouldn’t exactly come as a surprise.

When Mamoru returned to his living room, drinks in hand, he found Usagi looking around at the paintings on his walls. She seemed to be completely entranced by the colorful art, and his heart leapt when he saw her eyes widen with glee at the grand piano he had sitting near the windows. It had been his mother’s, one of the only things of her that remained.

She loved music, he knew, especially the piano. Mamoru had heard her talking to Ami about it once when they were all sitting at the fruit parlor. Usagi had always wanted to play, but had never learned, so instead, she just enjoyed listening to the instrument. She also loved to watch pianists work. “It’s like I’m under a spell when I watch someone play,” she had said to Ami with awe in her eyes. It was one of the many pieces of information he had stored away about her. Just another thing that made him love her all the more.

Mamoru cleared his throat lightly to make her aware of his presence. She turned toward him, a deep blush coming across her cheeks as if she were a child who’d been caught with their hand in a cookie jar.

In an effort to cover up her embarrassment, Usagi spoke, “You know, Mamoru-baka, this really is a nice place you’ve got here. These paintings are beautiful.” She said it with such sincerity that his breath caught.

“Thanks, Odango. It’s nice to know you can appreciate things in life other than sleeping, eating and shopping,” he winked at her, setting the drinks down on the coffee table.

“I’m going to do you a favor and ignore that comment.” But she stuck her tongue out at him for good measure. 

Usagi looked at the piano and then back at him, “Do you play?”

“A bit,” he said with a shrug of his shoulders. It wasn’t technically a lie. Just because he could play a bit better than most people in the world, had been playing since he was three and was the son of a world-renowned pianist didn’t make what he’d said a falsehood. 

But he was instantly upset at himself for not allowing her to see into his life. He loved her! Shouldn’t he try to let her in? 

The realization that she didn’t feel the same hit him harder than it ever had before, and kept him from opening himself up to her, content to stay in the shadows as he always had. It was safer there.

An awkward silence hung in the air between them. Usagi cocked her head to the side, and studied him, a quizzical expression on her face. “Say, Mamoru-baka, where are your parents? Are they out or something?”

Mamoru had known this question would come up eventually, he just hadn’t expected “eventually” to be ten minutes after her arrival. 

His parents had died when he was ten. Mamoru’s father, a painter, and his mother, a concert pianist, had been driving back from an exhibition when his father missed a turn, causing the car to fall into a deep ravine. 

For all intents and purposes, he had been alone ever since. There had been no immediate family left to take him in, so he ended up in the foster system, until he turned sixteen, when everything that had once belonged to his parent’s became his, and with enough money to live on for the rest of his life, if he chose, Mamoru had gone out on his own, the call of freedom too difficult to ignore.

His brain was scrambling to find an answer to give her. Telling the truth was off the table. Usagi would only feel sorry for him, and he didn’t want that. Couldn’t stand to have her look at him with pity in her eyes. No, he would just have to give her the best excuse he could muster.

“Well...uh...th-they don’t live here,” he offered, his face never wavering from the steely expression he wore, even as he stumbled over his words.

“Oh…,” came her quiet response, a confused look on her face. But she didn’t question him further. She just stood, rooted to the same spot he’d found her in when he’d entered the room.

Mamoru suddenly remembered why Usagi had come to his apartment in the first place. Tutoring. Right. He put a strained smile on his face, asking, “So, would you like to work on anatomy and physiology?”

A similar, strained smile made its way onto Usagi’s features, “Sure.”

For the next hour, Mamoru patiently went over her lessons from the day with her. He had never believed her to be stupid. It was so obvious that she wasn’t, with the way she took in the world around her. But it was easy to see that school subjects didn’t hold much interest for her. She would rather be outside in the world living these lessons, instead of reading about the possibility of them in a textbook.

While Usagi still seemed tense, she was picking things up rather quickly, and Mamoru delighted in her joy every time she got an answer correct. But being in such close proximity to her was intoxicating. She smelled of vanilla and lavender, and every time he would breathe, she would overwhelm his senses. 

Mamoru had to bite his cheek so he didn’t sigh with pleasure as her hair would come into contact with his arm every few minutes. It felt like the finest silk he’d ever touched, and it tumbled in waves of gold around her. If this was all he would ever have of her, he didn’t want to forget even the smallest detail.

All too soon, their time together was over, and Usagi was gathering her things to leave. “Well, thanks, I guess, Mamoru-baka,” she told him awkwardly.

“Anytime,” he replied with a smile, and he meant it. “See you at school tomorrow? If you can manage to not get lost on your way there?”

She turned back to him, already a few steps down the hallway, and gave him the most adorable eye roll he’d ever seen. With an exasperated sigh, she replied, “You just had to end it with that, didn’t you, Mamoru-baka?” And with a flurry of skirts and hair, she was gone.

When Usagi was out of sight, he closed the door, and sighed for what seemed like the hundredth time that night. 

Yep. It was time for another cold shower.

 

oOo

“So,” Usagi began, “can I just say how awful it is being tutored by Mamoru-baka twice a week?” She sat, stirring the remains of her strawberry milkshake that was long past its prime.

Rei raised an eyebrow at her, “Seriously, Usagi? This again?” Rei had a tendency to tell things like they were. Never holding back in order to spare another’s feelings. Usagi considered the raven-haired beauty to be one of her dearest friends, and she valued Rei’s opinion above almost anyone else’s, but her bluntness took some getting used to…

Usagi looked at her, surprise at the annoyed tone of her friend, “What?! You act like I talk about this all the time or something.” 

An unattractive snort from Rei was Usagi’s response, followed by, “You do talk about it all the time, genius.”

Minako, traitor that she was, was nodding her head furiously in agreement. “As much as I hate to agree with the pyro, she does have a point.”

Minako was nearly a carbon copy of Usagi in her looks, long blonde hair, shining blue eyes and bright smile. But there were subtle personality differences between the two that made them as different as they could be. 

Both girls were bright and bubbly, but Usagi’s came up naturally, the emotions genuine. Minako on the other hand, while genuinely a happy go lucky person, always seemed like she had the need to impress someone. Anyone, really. But Usagi could see down the core of who Minako was, a feisty, heart of gold girl who always had her back. Except for right now, apparently.

“Really, Mina? I would have thought you of all people would have backed me up on this!” Usagi cried, frustration evident in her voice. This was not going at all like she had hoped.

“Sorry, Usagi-chan, but you’re not fooling anyone, girl. You are in serious like with a certain tutor of yours.”

Usagi couldn’t believe the turn this conversation had taken. She had gone from expressing her distaste for the baka, and now they were telling her it was obvious she liked the boy? Oh, no they didn’t.

“What in the world are you all talking about?” Usagi seethed, as she angrily began stabbing her straw into the milkshake glass.

Makoto, bless her sweet soul, seemed to be the only one who was even attempting to take pity on Usagi. She placed a comforting hand on the blonde’s shoulder. “Easy, there, Usagi-chan.”

Makoto gave off the appearance of being tough as nails, and she was. But there was so much more underneath that tough girl exterior that Usagi felt so privileged to be able to see. Mako-chan, as Usagi had taken to calling her, was an amazing cook, and had aspirations of being a master chef one day. She also loved to raise and care for all sorts of plants, and Usagi always enjoyed hearing her talk about them, even if she had absolutely no idea what Makoto was talking about.

“You don’t have to admit to anything you don’t want to.” Makoto offered in what Usagi guess was an attempt to make things better. It didn’t.

“Wait. What?! No, I don’t like Mamoru-baka!.”

Mina gave her a knowing, sympathetic look, “Suuuureeee you don’t. We ‘get’ it,” she said using those obnoxious air finger quotes with the word “get”, ending with an overly obvious wink.

A growl was just about to leave Usagi’s throat, when Rei cut in, bringing the conversation back into focus. She raised an eyebrow at Usagi, not able to resist stoking the fire she was certain sparked just underneath the surface,“Usagi, you’re so obvious it hurts.”

Usagi looked at her wide eyed, her mouth partially open from the shock of Rei’s bluntness. “Wh-what do you mean?”

“Mamoru. It's so painfully obvious you like him, baka,” Rei rolled her eyes in annoyance. “It has been for a long time. At least since he started tutoring you six weeks ago. Maybe even before that. I think the only one whose dense enough not to realize it is you.”

She felt like she had been backed into a corner, and the only way out was continued denial. “You all are ridiculous. What on earth would make you think something like that?”

Rei couldn't help the smirk that came to her lips. “You really want me to answer that?”

Usagi remained defiant, looking Rei square in the eye and saying, “Yes, yes I do.”

The look on Rei’s face was unsettling. It was almost as if her features were saying challenge accepted, and as she began, Usagi winced. 

“Well, let’s start with the fact that you complain about him all the time. Without fail, anytime we’re together, you gripe about how much you hate spending time with him, how much of a jerk he is, why did your dad have to pick him to help you?”

“I don’t see what that proves,” Usagi answered indignantly. 

“It proves a lot, Odango,” Rei teased purposefully, and she was rewarded with a look of anger from Usagi.

“Don’t call me that,” Usagi seethed through clenched teeth. 

At this point, Minako decided she’d been left out of the conversation far too long, so she chimed in, “Why? Because only Mamoru can call you Odango?”

Usagi turned furious eyes towards Minako. “Minnnakkkoo….” she growled out, while Minako simply continued to sip away at her drink.

Rei decided it was time for her to continue to help Usagi see the error of her denials. Grinning at the exchange between Usagi and Minako, she snickered with approval, and then continued, “I’ve heard you talk about other people who upset you or frustrate you. You never get so worked up about them, nor do you repeatedly bring them up. It’s almost like you want us to validate your ‘hate’ towards him, because you’re too scared to admit to yourself that you like him.”

A stricken expression crossed Usagi’s face, which she quickly replace with a scowl, remembering her audience. She licked her lips, in an effort to buy herself more time to form her next thought. She spoke with an iciness in her voice that startled the other girls at the table, “And what other interesting insights do you have into my feelings, Rei?”

“Odango, you can deny it all you want, but you come alive when you fight with the guy. Even Minako noticed it, and that’s saying something.” 

Mina enthusiastically nodded her agreement, until she realized she had been insulted, opening her mouth to protest, but the conversation didn’t stop, as they ignored her and continued. 

Usagi looked at Rei with alarm etched into her features, “What?”

“Open your eyes, baka. Stop trying to squelch your feelings, because you’re afraid. Own them. And for the love of all that’s good, PLEASE stop complaining about him. It’s so predictable, it’s sad.”

Angry didn’t even begin to describe the emotions coursing through Usagi at that moment. How dare they sit there, telling her what she felt? Of course, if she stopped to think about it...

“Ok, so, maybe I don’t hate him. But only because he’s somewhat decent looking. Even I can admit that. And I guess he can be sweet. Sometimes. When he’s not being a complete ass, which is practically never. But I DON’T like him!”

Usagi felt a sense of relief as Mako-chan came to her rescue once again. “Ok, Rei, I think that’s enough. You shouldn’t go getting her hopes up like that.”

Rei, glowered at her. “What exactly am I getting her hopes up about?”

It was Mina’s turn to chime in, with a deep sigh, “Oh, right. That Mamoru still likes you, obviously.”

A deep frown crossed Rei’s face. “What? You guys are crazy. No, he doesn’t.”

“Uh, yeah he does. He told you you were a “special girl” when you broke up with him, and you still meet with him once a week. If that doesn’t scream that he still likes you, I don’t know what does,” Mina continued with Makoto nodding in agreement.

Usagi felt deflated. Even she had to admit that it did appear Mamoru still had feelings for Rei. Not to mention the fact that Rei was the only person she had ever seen the baka be consistently nice to. Well, besides Ami, but they seemed to be fairly good friends.

“They’re right, Rei,” Usagi said quietly. All three girls sitting at the table with her noticed the dejected tone in her voice.

Rei’s eyebrows raised as she slowly shook her head in denial. “You all are nuts. Mamoru and I are just friends. He’s like my brother, and I’m like a sister to him. He doesn’t feel anything more for me than that. I think I would know,” she finished with annoyance.

Usagi didn’t understand the feelings that were coursing through her, didn’t have the energy to sort through them after everything that had come to light in the conversation they were currently having. She stared blankly at the table, until a voice pushed through her thoughts.

“Hey, Usagi. Why don’t you tell us what was so annoying to you at your last meeting?” Rei asked lightly, her voice suddenly warm and friendly.

Usagi knew Rei was only asking to make her feel better, but she wasn’t about to turn down the opportunity to vent some of her frustration. She smiled, and took a deep breath. “Well…,”


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter threeeee is here! I love this one, so if you've got anything bad to say about it, DON'T. Just kidding, love you all, so much, please, please tell me what you think!
> 
> Huge thanks to my girl, FloraOne for her constant encouragement and beta skills. She's the best out there, hands down 3
> 
> There will be a few notes at the end of the chapter, so please stick around for those, and the next chapter should be out in a few days!

Usagi hadn't been herself for a few days. Ever since the utterly confusing and completely infuriating conversation she'd had with the girls the other day, she just felt...off. This was how she found herself feeling, as she knocked on Mamoru's door, the following Tuesday evening.

When he opened the door, he gave her his usual arrogant smirk, and she brushed past him without saying a word. "Are you alright, Odango?" he questioned.

She didn't even bother to fake a smile. "Yeah, I'm fine. Just had a weird day. Are you ready to help me study?" she asked, heading straight for the coffee table, keeping her eyes down, focused on appearing busy.

"Uh...yeah, of course."

When he didn't immediately appear at the table with her, Usagi looked back at him. Mamoru was still standing in the doorway, his entire body screaming of hesitance, as if he were afraid to approach her. Her gaze finally penetrated his thoughts, and he nearly jumped in his quickness to get over to her.

As they began to go over her homework, Usagi couldn't help but watch Mamoru as he worked with her. She could see for the first time, and only because she hadn't taken the time to really look before, that he took great care in explaining each concept to her, without making her feel stupid like so many of her teachers seemed fond of doing.

If she didn't understand something, he would always think of a different way to explain it to her. It was as if he was constantly adjusting himself to meet her needs.

But why? Why would someone who cared so little about her take the time to do that? Sure, he was getting paid, but he could just as easily have drilled her for answers over and over again until their time was up. But he never did.

And her grades had improved since she had started working with him, almost impressively so. Usagi had never seen her parents beam at a progress report she'd brought home, but since she'd been working with Mamoru, this had happened on more than one occasion.

Mamoru always made sure she was comfortable during their sessions, as well. He had snacks for her to eat and a whole fridge of options to choose from for drinks. And when Usagi thought about it, he did always seem to have a full stock of her favorite things. It was almost as if he'd payed attention to what she liked, and then made sure he had it for her.

But why?

This seemed to be a recurring theme for her thoughts when it came to Chiba Mamoru.

As Usagi got lost in her musings, she found herself openly staring at him as he poured over her textbook. He was certainly gorgeous. With ebony black hair that fell over his eyes in a way that many men paid hundreds of dollars to have their hair lay, but his did it naturally. He was tall, lean, but impressively fit. She could see the muscles in his arms when he sat close to her like this. Not overly huge, but certainly big enough to make their presence known. And his eyes. Well, they were endless pools of deep ocean blue. Usagi had never known eyes could be so deep and alluring as his. She began to imagine what it would be like to have his soft hair brush against her forehead, as she gazed into his eyes and ran her hand over the tight muscles of his stomach…

"Usagi?" Mamoru was looking at her with an amused smile on his face. "You kinda spaced out there, is everything ok?"

She looked away from him, blushing deeply, and rubbed her fingers over her temples to try and clear her head.

"I'm sorry, Mamoru, I'm ok, I just can't seem to concentrate today." As she paused in her speech, a realization hit her. "Hey! You called me 'Usagi'!" she cried excitedly.

Mamoru cocked one eyebrow in amusement. "...that is your name, isn't it?"

Usagi rolled her eyes in exasperation. "Yes, baka. But you've never called me by it before."

He scratched the back of his neck, appearing to think. "Really? Well, I do apologize, Usagi. It appears I have been remiss, and do pray that you can forgive my earlier rudeness," he replied, smiling at her, and she giggled as a real smile lit her face.

A deep emotion she couldn't quite name crossed Mamoru's eyes when she smiled. Whatever it was made her shiver in anticipation from the intensity of it.

"There's your smile," he spoke again, the nameless emotion still dancing across his eyes. "I was beginning to wonder if it would make an appearance tonight."

She giggled again, unable to keep the mirth from her voice. "Chiba Mamoru, if I didn't know any better, I'd think you were trying to cheer me up."

Mamoru grinned and leaned a little closer to her. "Is it working?"

Usagi pretended to think for a second, "Well...I mean, you're doing a decent job...I guess. But there is one thing you could do that I know would make my day better."

"Anything," he breathed out.

"Play for me," she said, eyes wandering over to the piano. He sighed slightly, but the smile never left his face.

"Oh, alright. Just this once…" he shook a finger at her teasingly, as he rose to walk over to the instrument.

She giddily followed, and sat herself down next to him on the piano bench, as if she belonged there. And the funny thing was, if felt like she belonged there.

"So," he began, stretching his fingers, "you are a lover of Debussy, are you not?"

Usagi was stunned, a look of surprise clearly visible on her face. "H-how did you know that?"

Mamoru blushed slightly, and looked down at the black and white keys. "I heard you telling Ami about it it once."

Her heart did a strange flip-flop in her chest, and she loved the feeling. "You...remembered that?"

He simply gave a sheepish smile, and a brief nod of the head.

Usagi smiled, brightly. "Yes, I do love Debussy. Could you play some for me?"

Mamoru looked at her as if she'd asked the most obvious question in the world. "Of course I can. Any requests?"

Thinking for a moment, Usagi realized this might be the only time he would ever play for her, so she decided to ask for her favorite in the hopes that might he know it. "Do you know the one about the cathedral that rises up out of the sea, and then sinks again? I can't pronounce it, correctly…" she trailed off, noticing recognition dawn on his face.

"La cathédrale engloutie?" he asked with a perfect French pronunciation. At least she figured it was. It certainly sounded French to her.

She was overjoyed, nonetheless, "Yes, that's the one!"

"One sunken cathedral, coming right up," he quipped, placing his hands into position.

"Wait," Usagi stopped him. "Don't you need music or something?" There was none anywhere that she could see.

Mamoru chuckled slightly. "No. It's all up here," he replied, pointing to his head.

Usagi's mouth fell open in an 'O' shape, as he turned back to the piano, and began to play.

The piece started out almost inaudibly with low, quiet tones. Usagi wouldn't have known he was playing if she hadn't seen his hands moving. And as the melody began to rise from the depths of the sea, she was immediately under his spell. Her eyes closing briefly as the beauty of the music washed over her. There were no words to describe what she was privileged enough to bear witness to in that moment.

Mamoru was...a master. Never before had she seen someone play so effortlessly, as if they had been born for the piano. His fingers moving over the keys as if they were an old lover he revisited often, caressing each note as if it was the most important one he'd ever played. She found herself wondering what it would be like if her skin were the keys, his long, nimble fingers caressing her, instead...

The emotion in his playing brought her thoughts back down to Earth. Usagi could feel the music inside her soul. No one had ever made her feel so much without saying a word, and before she knew it, there were tears beginning to fall down her cheeks from the intensity of it all.

As the piece swelled to its final climax, Usagi found herself wishing it would never end. Because when it did, she would walk out his door, and things would go back to the way they had always been. The thought made the tears come harder.

When he had finished, Usagi looked at him, tears still falling down her face and into her lap. "Usa!" Mamoru said, alarm evident in his voice, hands reaching out to grab hers. "What's wrong?"

A watery, amazed smile came to her then. "That was...incredible, Mamoru," Usagi nearly choked on the sincerity of her words. "Where did you learn to play like that?"

She nearly gasped at the haunted sadness Mamoru didn't even try to hide. "My mother taught me," he said in a voice so low, she had to strain to hear him.

Usagi looked down and realized that he still had hold of her hands. She had no idea what had caused such a deep sorrow in him, but all she could think about was making it better. Squeezing his hands reassuringly, she spoke, "Thank you, Mamoru, truly. That was...you did more for me tonight, than you realize," and she smiled at him, not even fully understanding herself the depth of what her words meant.

As they stared at each other, Usagi found her head was slowly moving towards his as if she were a moth to a flame. But she took delight in noticing that his head was moving towards hers as well, with that deep emotion she couldn't name back in his eyes.

Her eyes slowly trailed down to his lips, unable to hide the desire that flickered in her eyes as he ran his tongue over his mouth, in what Usagi could only interpret as anticipation.

I'm about to kiss Mamoru-baka. How's that for owning your feelings, Rei?! And with that thought, Usagi closed her eyes, and angled her head ever so slightly as…

...her phone rang. She and Mamoru sprang apart from each other as if they'd just been struck by the same bolt of lightning.

Silently cursing whoever was on the other end of the phone, she pulled it out of her pocket, and sighed when she saw it was Minako. Usagi was certain she was calling to get the dirt on her latest tutoring session. With a roll of her eyes, she sent Mina to voicemail, and then noted it was nearly eight o'clock.

"Goodness, I didn't realize it had gotten so late," she said as she stood from the piano bench, Mamoru slowly rising after her, as she gathered her things in silence.

After she'd put on her shoes, Usagi turned back to Mamoru, and smiled brightly at him. "Thank you so much for everything, today, Mamoru. You really made all the difference."

He returned her smile with a genuine one of his own. "Anytime, Usa," Usagi's heart skipped a beat at the name. "I'm glad I could help."

A mischievous grin made it's way to her lips, "I'll see you tomorrow, Mamoru-baka."

Mamoru laughed outright, causing her heart to flip-flop, again. "I'll be looking forward to it, Odango Atama," he replied winking at her.

She gave him one final wave, before heading out the door, as she began her walk home.

The smile that graced her features caused many people in her path to smile as well, wondering what had caused the young, blonde beauty to be so joyous. And truly, Usagi hadn't felt so light in so, so long.

But she couldn't keep her mind from wandering back to the sadness that she'd seen on Mamoru's face, wondering what could have possibly affected him so deeply...And suddenly, the puzzle started to come together.

Mamoru was the son of a pianist. His parents were nowhere to be seen, except for one photo he kept on a bookshelf that she'd seen during her first tutoring session. The sadness in his eyes...it all made sense!

Usagi raced up to her room upon entering her home, calling out a quick greeting to her parents as she climbed the stairs. Heading straight for her bookshelf containing all her CD cases, she skimmed the rows until she came upon a disc of Debussy works. The first time she'd heard La cathédrale engloutie was when she'd listened to this CD.

She had done some research on the pianist when she first bought the record, and was saddened to learn the woman and her husband had died in a car crash, leaving behind a son.

There was a photo of the artist on the cover. A beautiful, young woman with flowing, raven hair, and blue eyes like the ocean. Her name was Chiba, Kazuko.

With trembling fingers, Usagi opened the case looking at the insert where she saw words that made her heart clench in painful recognition.

"For my beloved son, Mamoru."

oOo

Mamoru sat leaning against a tree during lunch, desperately needing the fresh air. His friend, Asanuma, and though Mamoru knew the blonde haired, doe eyed boy next to him practically worshiped the ground he walked on, he couldn't help but feel an affection towards him. Asanuma was a nice kid, and one who didn't mind Mamoru's tendency to sit in silence, which was an added bonus.

Of course, the main reason he had elected to sit outside was because Usagi and her group of friends always sat outside as well. It was the perfect opportunity for him to watch her and sort through his feelings of the previous night's events.

If he hadn't already been in love with her, he certainly would be now. The way her eyes had lit up at his attempts to cheer her, and her reaction to his piano performance had been so genuine and unguarded that the ache he felt to hold her had never been so strong. Which led his thoughts to the fact that he had almost kissed her.

He, Chiba Mamoru, had almost kissed her, Tsukino Usagi.

Mamoru didn't realize he'd voiced his groan out loud, causing Asanuma to look on in concern. "Mamoru-senpai, are you alright?"

Mamoru snapped his head towards his friend, a blush creeping up his cheeks, "Y-yes, I'm fine. Just thinking about a...calculus test I've got coming up."

Mentally, chiding himself for allowing his emotions to come out so easily, Mamoru turned his gaze back to Usagi, who was currently picking her way through Makoto's bento. She was as bright and happy as always, which caused his heart to sink at the thought that what had happened the night before had absolutely no effect on her.

But Mamoru underestimated his gaze, as Usagi appeared to feel someone watching her. She looked up, and caught his eyes.

Smiling back at him lightly, Mamoru felt the blush returning to his face. He averted his eyes, towards the suddenly interesting grass, not daring to look at her again, just yet, when suddenly, a pair of small shoes appeared in the increasingly interesting grass just in front of him.

Mamoru swallowed nervously, as his gaze began to travel up towards the shoe's owner. Usagi stood in front of him, bento box in hand, with a bright smile on her face.

Asanuma was the first to speak, "Hey Usagi-chan! Want to sit with us?'

Her gaze never left Mamoru's as she asked, addressing only him, "Would you mind?"

Mamoru's throat ran dry, and it took him a good ten seconds to find his voice. "N-no, not at all. Please, sit."

Usagi's smile brightened even more, as she sat down between the two boys, and Mamoru was even more confused than he had been two minutes prior. Why did she seem so happy to be in his presence? It made no sense. Why couldn't women ever make sense?

Feeling her questioning gaze on him, Mamoru turned toward her, mind racing for some mundane topic to talk about. "So...Usa, how'd your quiz go, today?" he asked, suddenly remembering that the material he'd gone over with her last night was for a small quiz that day.

"It was great! I knew every single question, and even the bonus," she replied excitedly.

He really wished her eyes would stop lighting up like that. Not able to keep the smile from spreading onto his lips, he replied, genuinely, "That's wonderful, Usa. I knew you'd be fine."

She beamed at him, and turned her attention back to her bento, and began polite conversation with Asanuma.

Mamoru smiled to himself, loving so much how she never allowed anyone to feel like an outsider in her presence.

He remained quiet for most of the conversation, only adding in the occasional comment when a question was directed towards him, simply content to be in her presence.

His heart felt lighter, note quite daring to hope that there might be some return of his feelings, but happy all the same that she finally seemed comfortable in his presence.

As the bell rang, signaling the end of lunch, the three companions rose to return to the building. Usagi turned to Mamoru, "So, six o'clock on Friday?" she asked expectantly.

He smiled warmly. "It's a date."

And as he watched her skip back to her friends, hair flying around her, joy radiating from every part of her, his entire being felt warmed by the sight of her. Mamoru finally allowed his heart to breathe dangerous thoughts into his mind. Was there hope after all?

But she had completely neglected to mention anything about what had or almost happened the night before. Not a bit of nervousness. Usagi was completely unphased.

Had she not wanted him to kiss her? Had he just imagined that her head was leaning towards his as well?

A voice entered his thoughts. "Mamoru-senpai, are you coming? You're going to be late for class."

Another blush graced his cheeks at being caught day dreaming, and he quickly grabbed his bag, slinging it over his shoulder as he walked back inside.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You should DEFINITELY take a listen to the piece Mamoru plays for Usagi. It's my all time favorite piano work, and it's just...beautiful. Plus, being an impressionistic era piece, it does tell a story, which you can easily find as well. SO SO GOOD.
> 
> Also, Mamoru's mother's name can be translated to mean "harmonious child," which I thought was fitting for her.
> 
> Please let me know what you think, and thank you SO much for reading!


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Heeeyyyyyyy there. I know, I know. It took me like a week to update. I ended up with a stomach flu, and then when I tried to go back and write, it was just...awful lol BUT thanks to my lovely FloraOne, I was able to slowly get the next chapter down. I hope you enjoy, and I LIVE for your feedback and reviews <3

It was finally Friday. Usagi couldn’t help but skip down the street as the happiness of what the day meant washed over her. Friday meant freedom. Friday meant sleeping in the next morning. And, perhaps best of all, Friday meant tutoring with Mamoru. Usagi shook her head at the direction her thoughts were taking her.

Mamoru. 

Usagi’s mind was filled with the ebony haired boy, as she made her way to his apartment. Ever since she had discovered the truth about his parents, she couldn’t seem to get him out of her head. Not because she had an overwhelming pity for him and his circumstance. But because it allowed Usagi to see Mamoru in a completely different light. A beautiful light that made this enigma into something she could finally understand.

Of course she felt for him. Deeply. Usagi couldn’t imagine the pain he’d had to endure since his parents had died. But she felt she knew Mamoru well enough to know that the last thing he wanted or needed was her pity. Usagi didn’t even feel a need to mention it to him. The subject of his parents would come up when he was ready for it to, and she wasn’t about to push such a painful topic onto him because of some selfish need of her own to talk about it.

Encounter after encounter with Mamoru flashed across Usagi’s mind, and not just his interactions with her, but with those that were closest to him, as well. She had seen him interact with countless people, always so polite and encouraging, but there was still something that seemed...off. 

He was lonely.

A sadness came over her at the thought. Mamoru kept people at arm’s length. He was warm and kind to everyone, except her, of course, and the smile he wore was friendly and inviting. Usagi couldn’t help but think there was always a careful mask set in place. His smile never quite reached his eyes, and the warmth he emitted seemed to have a warning with it. Don’t come too close, or you’ll get burned. 

Thoughts swirling, Usagi’s pace slowed as a realization hit her. If she knew all these things about Mamoru, then how long had she been observing him, watching him from a distance? She groaned audibly as the answer came to her, clear as day.

From the very beginning.

But there was one question that remained, one she couldn’t quite find the answer to. Why did he treat her the way he did? The teasing, the insults, the endless bickering...What was so different about her?

She knew it wasn’t because he liked her. Mamoru was a smart, empathetic guy. Teasing was how elementary aged boys interacted with girls they liked, not eighteen year olds. He had to be more in touch with his feelings than that. So, the only logical explanation was that she annoyed him, and he did his best to push her away with insults. But always a glutton for punishment, Usagi couldn’t stay away.

And then there were the events of their last tutoring session, where Usagi was so sure he was doing everything in his power to make her smile.

It had worked. Like a balm on her soul. The way he joked with her, played for her, and smiled for her...but not one of his usual smiles. No, this smile had reached all the way to his eyes. Had made her heart pound traitorously in her chest. 

Usagi felt a deep blush rising on her cheeks as she recalled the fact that she’d almost kissed Mamoru the last time she was at his apartment, which made her current state of mind all that much more confusing. 

She could have sworn he was leaning into her to accept the kiss...but he hadn’t mentioned anything about it when she was around him at lunch a couple of days ago. And he had seemed to hesitate when she asked if she could sit with them, like he was only agreeing because it was the polite thing to do. Plus, there was the annoying fact that he only ever talked to her about school work. Didn’t he realize that he wasn’t being paid outside of these two hours he was tutoring her? That he could be a “real” person with her the rest of the time?

Usagi couldn’t help the deep feelings of regret that washed over her when she thought that if she’d only been just a little bolder, she would know what it was like to kiss Mamoru. Her eyes widened at the thought. Why in the world did she want to know so badly what it was like to kiss him, anyway?

This was the place her thoughts had taken her to, as she knocked on Mamoru’s door. And when he opened the door, standing in front of her in casual glory, with perfectly tousled hair, endless blue eyes, and a smile she had only ever seen him send her way, a second realization hit Usagi.

“Usa,” he greeted warmly.

“H-...he…” She stumbled on what to say, finally squeaking out, “M-mamoru.” Frowning, Usagi pushed past him, and made her way into the living room, trying her best to ignore the adorably confused look he’d had on his face, and failing miserably when she felt that familiar flutter of excitement in her chest.

Shit, shit, shit. You know full-well why you want to kiss him, you baka.

She was in love with Mamoru.

oOo

“Are you ready to move onto the inner ear?” Usagi visibly jumped at his voice. 

It had been over half an hour since Usagi had arrived for her tutoring session, and she was still acting incredibly strange.The only word Mamoru could think of to describe her was, “fidgety.” 

He couldn’t help but chuckle to himself at that. He was usually the fidgety one. Anytime Mamoru found himself in an uncomfortable situation, which was pretty much on a daily basis, he would find himself squirming, never able to sit still. And that was exactly what the girl in front of him now was doing.

Taking her non-response as an answer to his question, Mamoru continued, “So...let’s start with the vestibular.” Chancing a glance her way, a shiver ran down his spine as he saw her lick her lips, eyes boring into his.

What in the world is she thinking about? Mamoru decided to try and lighten the mood, “The vestibular’s function is to register the body’s movements, thus ensuring we keep our balance.” A smirk began at the corners of his lips. “Yours obviously never developed fully, Odango.” With this, he poked her in her ribs and winked at her.

A deep frown crossed his face as he noticed Usagi’s reaction. She sprung away from him as if his touch had scalded her. When she didn’t move back to her original position at his side, he was scared his comments had gone too far.

“I was only joking, Usa. Are you alright?”

Usagi looked back at him as if she were a rabbit that had been cornered by a hound. “Y-yes. Why...why would you think I wasn’t?”

Mamoru continued to look at her with concerned etched on his face. He shrugged his shoulders, “Just a hunch, I guess.”

He needed some air. Fast. “I’m going to go get something to drink, do you want anything?”

She shook her head from side to side, vigorously indicating what Mamoru could only interpret as a desperate want for him to get away from her for a minute. So, he obliged both of them.

When he walked into the kitchen, Mamoru laid his forehead against the cool wood of the cabinets, trying to repress the well of emotions that threatened to spill out. 

Usagi was acting as if she couldn’t stand to be in his presence. Why was the girl always so hot and cold?! He felt as if he was suffering from whiplash at how often her attitude towards him changed.

Three days ago she’d leaned towards him as if she’d wanted to kiss him. Had smiled so brightly at him, he could have drowned in how beautiful it was. Then two days ago at lunch, she’d asked if she could sit with him. Him! But hadn’t said a word about what had or hadn’t almost happened in his apartment. She had still smiled that brilliant smile at him, though, almost giving him hope that she could, at the very least, like him as a friend some day.

But now...now, she acted as if his mere presence repulsed her. 

And he couldn’t blame her, really. Afterall, he had spent the better part of a year teasing her anytime they crossed paths. He was a fool to think that a few pleasant interactions would erase all the harm he’d undoubtedly done. 

Raking a frustrated hand through his hair, Mamoru grabbed a bottle of water, and reluctantly returned to the living room.

He sat down closer to her than he’d been before in an effort to gauge her reaction. Usagi didn’t move away, but Mamoru could feel her entire body stiffen. With a mumbled, “Sorry,” he moved away from her slightly, deliberately avoiding eye contact with her. 

Clearing his throat, he continued on with her incredibly mundane school work. Mamoru tried his best to keep his voice steady, afraid that it would betray him if he didn’t control the shaking he felt so acutely inside of him. 

“Alright...let’s see,” he struggled to find his place in the text book. “Oh, right. Next, there’s the auditory nerve. It’s a highly sensitive bundle of nerves…” Mamoru was unable to finish his sentence as Usagi lost her balance. She was sitting at his coffee table, propped up on her elbow, when her support gave out on her, causing her to tumble down to the floor.

Mamoru had opened his mouth to tease her about how fitting it was that she give such a perfect demonstration of the importance of the inner ear, but the words were swallowed up when she landed in his lap.

Their eyes clashed, and his eyes grew impossibly large when she didn’t move away from her newfound position on his legs. 

Usagi licked her lips, and spoke, her eyes never leaving his, “I-I’m sorry.”

He licked his lips in answer, and began to open his mouth to tell her that it was more than alright, but before he could make a sound, Usagi’s lips were on his, ensuring the words were lost forever.

In the blink of an eye, she had moved from laying in his lap to her legs being firmly planted on either side of his waist, and he was frozen.

He had to be dreaming. There was no possible way that Usagi was here kissing the daylights out of him. Truly, this only happened in his dreams, but dream Usa didn’t feel as soft and warm and and sweet as the Usa in his arms now, did.

Because she’s real, baka! And that’s her tongue trying to get into your mouth!

Mamoru realized with a start that he wasn’t kissing her back. In an instant, all hesitation was gone, as he returned her kiss with equal enthusiasm. 

It was everything he’d ever dreamed it would be. She tasted of cream soda, and her hair smelled of strawberries. Mamoru couldn’t help burying his hands in her endless strands of golden hair, reveling in the feel of silk beneath his fingers, and loving the sigh she emitted when he pulled her even closer to him. This was heaven, and no God that had existed or would exist could convince him otherwise. 

But in an instant, it was all ripped away.

Mamoru blinked confusedly, his eyes slowly focusing on Usagi, who now sat a good five feet away from him, breathing as if she was unable to get enough oxygen to her lungs.

“Usa…” he whispered, confusion once again coloring his voice, as he reached a hand towards her, trying to bring her back to him.

She blushed, and looked away, moving to gather her things faster than Mamoru had ever seen her, blindly stuffing books and papers into her bag.

His heart fell, mind screaming for him to beg for her kisses, again. Please stay…

Usagi had clearly changed her mind about kissing him when he had begun to respond. Doubts exploded in his mind, once again. Was he bad at it? Was he really that gross? What had he done wrong? He’d do anything he could to fix it!

When Mamoru was finally able to form words, nothing even remotely close to what he was screaming on the inside came out. “Wi...will you be back on Tuesday?”

His stomach wrenched at the strangled sound that left her mouth at his question. With a single nod of her head, Usagi fled to the door. Flying into the hallway, she didn’t even stop to put her shoes on, simply grabbed them in her hand, never looking back.

Mamoru stood rooted to the same spot, for what could have been hours. He stared at the door, thoughts flying in an attempt to bring focus to...anything.

What the hell had just happened?


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ladies and probably no gentlemen, here is the long awaited (three days is long, right?!) fifth installment in this somewhat beloved story! This chappy was a labor of love. I had no desire to write it, and just wanted it to end. But thankfully, as usual, my darling friend, FloraOne encouraged me to keep going, and helped me get it written. She's as much to thank for this story as I am, and I'm incredibly grateful!
> 
> Hope you enjoy, and as always, feedback is encouraged, loved and needed! Thank you, lovelies!

Usagi's feet had decided her destination long before her brain realized where she was going. There were so many emotions coursing through her, and she just needed to get them out. So, she ran to the one person who could help in a crisis such as this.

Minako.

When she arrived at Mina's door, Usagi began to incessantly ring the doorbell, silently willing her friend to move faster in answer to her call.

A muffled voice came from the other side of the door, "Salt! Who goes there?!"

Sparing a quick second to roll her eyes, Usagi cried back, "Minaaaaa! It's me, Usagi. I'm in the middle of a crisis!"

No sooner had the word, "crisis" left her mouth when the barrier between the two girls flung open, a bright-eyed, and all too excited looking, Minako waiting on the other side.

"Usagi-chan!" she exclaimed, pulling Usagi inside, a comforting arm around her shoulder. "Come on in, and tell Mina-P alllll about your troubles."

Throwing herself down on the bed with a groan, Usagi felt her pent up emotions start to flood out. Her lower lip started to tremble, as her problems came out in a wail. "Mina, I'm such an idiot!"

Sitting in the chair across from her, Mina leaned towards her with a gleam in her eye. "Oooo, Usagi, what happened?! Did you finally move up to a B-cup?"

An exasperated cry left Usagi's lips. "Mina, this is serious! You know I would have called you from the shop if that were the case!"

Realizing her mistake, Mina nodded in agreement. "That's SO true!" she replied, giggling at herself. "Well, if that's not it then spill! You can't keep a sister in suspense like this!"

Glaring at her friend, Usagi took a deep breath, hugging her sides in the hopes that her arms would somehow protect her from the reaction that would be coming her way once she dropped the bomb she was holding.

"Mina...I-I," she paused to lick her lips, steadying herself. "I kissed Mamoru."

Clutching her eyes shut, she waited for the explosion, but instead, was greeted with eerie silence. Bravely peaking at the room around her with one eye, she found a dumbstruck Minako, with her mouth hung open, eyes as wide as saucers.

Hesitantly, Usagi spoke, fearing her friend had stopped breathing, "...Mina?"

"Shut. Up." The blonde with the bright red bow finally found her voice.

Usagi was taken aback by Mina's response, "W-what?"

Mina's eyes grew impossibly larger. "You kissed Hottie with a Body MAMORU CHIBA?!"

"Hottie with a what?!"

"Oh, no, no, no, Usagi," Mina said, cutting her off with a wagging finger in her face. "I'm the one asking questions, now." With this, Mina skipped over to Usagi, grabbing her hands to bring the two of them to sit on the floor, face to face, knees touching. This was what Minako referred to as Gossip Position.

"Ok, Usagi-chan. When did this happen?"

Usagi took a deep breath. "Like, half an hour ago…"

"Ooo, you're straight from the scene of the crime! I'm honored." Mina practically beamed at her, until her face grew suddenly serious. "I need details. Now."

"Well, you know he's been tutoring me for weeks now, and I realized after that conversation we had last week that I really did like Mamoru. Like a lot. Maybe...maybe I even love him." Usagi paused after this revelation, feeling a weight lift off her chest at being able to say her feelings out loud. Even if it wasn't to the person she so desperately wanted to say them to.

After glancing at Minako, and seeing her nod of encouragement, Usagi went on. "I was so blind to not see it. And when I did, it was like I was a magnet or something. I couldn't stay away from him, didn't want to stay away from him! So, tonight, when I went over to his apartment for tutoring, he just looked so good, and I lost my balance and ended up in his lap, and…" Usagi was cut off here by a shocked cry from Minako, but she kept on, afraid that is she stopped it wouldn't come out again, "I don't know what came over me, but before I knew it I was kissing him…"

When she looked at Minako after finishing her tale, Usagi saw tears begin to stream down Mina's cheeks. Concerned, Usagi gasped out, "Mina! What's wrong?!"

With a dramatic sniffle, Minako replied, "I...have never been more proud of you in my entire life, Usagi-chan."

The concern on Usagi's face was replaced with a mixture of confusion and frustration. "What in the world are you talking about?"

"You! I'm so proud of you! You were bold, you took charge and went for what you wanted. Which, in case you were wondering, is basically my life motto."

"I wasn't wondering. No one wonders about that, Mina. No one," Usagi deadpanned, and when a frown appeared on Mina's face, she decided to keep talking in the hopes of not having to explain her comment. "But even though it was what I wanted, it obviously wasn't what he wanted," she said, her entire posture seeming to droop.

"What do you mean?"

Usagi released a frustrated groan. "He didn't kiss me back... at least, not for a while. It was like he was frozen."

"So...like he was frozen because he was just so overwhelmed by the fact that he had a beautiful blonde girl attempting to make out with him?" Minako asked, hopeful.

With a shake of her head, Usagi replied dejectedly, "No. It was like he was shocked and weirded out and he couldn't figure out what to do."

"Are you sure? Trying to figure out someone else's emotions can be misleading sometimes. You could be totally reading it wrong," Minako told her, a hopeful tone still embedded in her words.

"No. I'm sure. I don't know how, but I just...know." Usagi's eyes remained focused on one particular patch of carpet that began to blur as water filled her eyes.

"I'm so sorry, Usagi-chan," Minako offered, sympathetically, as Usagi began to sniffle, trying in vain to suppress tears, "he doesn't deserve you, anyway. Homeboy just doesn't know what he's missing."

Usagi couldn't help but smirk at Minako's use of the word, "homeboy,"and she listened intently as her friend continued, "And look on the bright side, I mean, at least he kissed you back, eventually, right? Not everyone gets the chance to kiss their high school crush, you know."

With a nod of her head, Usagi got lost in remembering the feeling of it all. "He did. It was...amazing, Mina." Her eyes grew soft, "I felt things I've never felt before. He tasted like coffee and chocolate, and he smelled so...so clean! And his hair felt like silk. I just...I couldn't take it any longer. It was like I needed him or something."

A dreamy sigh left Mina's mouth. "Oh, my dearest, darlingest, little Usagi. You sound like a woman in love, my friend."

Usagi took in a steadying breath. "I do love him," she said with the beginnings of a smile. But in an instant, her face fell as tears rushed to the surface. "He doesn't want me, Mina," and she buried her face in her hands.

Feeling a warm arm encircle her shoulders, Usagi looked up into Mina's reassuring face. "It's okay, Usa. I know it sucks a big one, but there's tons of other eels in the sea! This is just one silly, stupid, albeit completely gorgeous idiot you'll have to contend with," she said while patting Usagi's back gently.

Afraid that she'd seem overdramatic, Usagi didn't dare to voice that Mamoru sure didn't feel like one of those guys; the ones you dated until you finally found a good one. He felt like he was the guy. One she could take home to her mother, or cuddle a Saturday away with, or...

Mina's voice brought Usagi out of her thoughts, "And besides, Usagi-chan, you really should be proud of what you did, today. You were brave enough to plant yourself in Mamoru Chiba's lap, and kiss the daylights out of him. If you'd asked me last week if I thought you were bold enough to do that, I'd have laughed in your face."

Usagi glared at her, good-naturedly. "Gee thanks, Mina."

Smiling, Mina went on, "You have to know that it's okay to do things like that, Usagi. It's okay to be attracted to a guy. It's okay to want to bone him on his living room floor. It's okay to enjoy and embrace your sexuality. You shouldn't ever be ashamed of it."

"I'm just so embarrassed, Mina. How am I ever supposed to face him again?"

"You do it with your head held high, and your hair perfectly in place, that's how," Minako scolded gently. "You're not going to let this get you down. You are far too fierce for such nonsense," she finished matter of factly.

"But-"

"No, Usagi. I mean it," a serious tone edged its way into her voice. "You're stronger than that."

Despite the aching in her chest, Usagi did feel lighter after hearing Minako's words. "Thank you, Mina-P. You are much, much wiser than you let on," she said with a teasing smile.

A lightbulb went off behind Minako's eyes, "Speaking of which…" and she jumped up, heading over to a small drawer in her desk.

Usagi watched with amusement, as Minako ruffled through a bunch of clutter in search of…

"Ta-da!" Mina exclaimed, holding up a long string of condoms, "These are for you!"

"MINA! What the heck?! I don't need those!" Usagi blushed wildly, disbelief in her voice.

"I'm pretty sure those were the same words spoken by like half the parents of the world who just couldn't keep it in their pants."

"But-"

"Take them. Now that you've discovered your sexual agency, you never know when you might need them." At the sound of Usagi's protest, she continued, "I'm not saying you'll need them for Mamoru, but I do have a sneaking suspicion you'll need them sooner than you think you will. And I'd better be the first person you see after you use one of those bad boys," Mina insisted with a scandalous wink.

Usagi found the small, foiled packages being shoved into her hands, and realizing it was pointless to argue with Minako, she sighed, rolled her eyes, and acquiesced. "Fine. But you're totally wrong about me using them soon. Not gonna happen." After a brief pause, she continued, "Do I want to know why you have a drawer full of condoms?"

Minako winked at her, again. "Preparation is everything, my dear friend! Now, come on, I've got a shit ton of ice cream, and an overwhelming urge to watch Titanic. Care to join me?" she wiggled her eyebrows suggestively.

Usagi grinned and nodded. Throwing the condoms in her backpack, she giggled as she watched Minako skip off to the kitchen.

Who needed gorgeous, sexy, smart and talented boys when you had friends like Usagi did?

oOo

Monday. As if the day weren't bad enough in its own right. But this Monday took the cake for Mamoru, as he sat watching the object of his affections in the cafeteria, unable to tear his eyes away from her.

It was raining, which Mamoru thought was incredibly fitting of his mood, as if the Earth was somehow connected to his emotions. Yeah, right, he thought to himself with a grim smirk. As if the Earth cared about him.

The weather had given him one advantage, however. Mamoru had spent the first half of the day attempting to find Usagi so he could talk to her about...whatever it was that had happened three days prior. But she had somehow managed to evade him at every turn.

He found himself thanking every God he could think of when the lunch bell rang, and the rain was still pouring down. This would force Usagi to remain inside, and he knew, no matter what her feelings were towards him, there was no way she would skip lunch.

She was walking about twenty feet ahead of him with her friend Minako, when he spotted her, and before he knew it, he found himself calling out her name.

He watched as she stilled instantly at the sound of his voice. Torturously slow, she turned to face him, and they stared at each other. Mamoru opened his mouth to speak, but no sound would come. Anger flashed over Usagi's face, and in a huff, she'd turned around, taken Minako's arm, and continued to move away from him.

Shit, shit, shit.

Was he honestly THAT repulsive to her? Did she regret kissing him so much that he wasn't even worth her time anymore?

"I knew I should've stayed home, today," he mumbled to himself, as he began to make his way towards the table that was occupied by his friends, which was, naturally, seated just across from the table Usagi sat at.

And so, he stared, openly, without care and completely oblivious to the conversation that was going on around him. He remained that way until Asanuma's voice flittered into his mind. "Mamoru-sempai? Are you alright?"

Never tearing his eyes away from Usagi, Mamoru bit out, "Yes. I'm fine." He prayed Asanuma would take the hint and drop his line of questioning, but was saved from having to worry about his friend when the bell rang signaling that lunch had met its end.

As he watched Usagi leave the room, he found himself wishing he could curse the day he'd ever met Tsukino Usagi. But he couldn't. Nothing could outweigh the love he held for the slip of a girl that filled his days and haunted his nights, and that angered him even more. Angered him that he didn't have more control over his emotions.

With a sigh, he grabbed his bag and headed towards his next class, as the rain began to fall harder.

oOo

Minako looked upon Usagi with concern as they slowly made their way towards class. "Usagi-chan, are you alright?"

Usagi avoided eye contact with her, as she stared straight ahead, "N-no. Not really." She didn't even bother trying to lie. Minako would see right through it anyway.

Usagi felt Minako squeeze her hand in comfort. "What was that earlier? When he called out to you? It was like he wanted to say something to you," Minako queried. Usagi simply shrugged her shoulders, not wanting to discuss it any further, as she could feel her emotions starting to betray her. She had felt that he'd wanted to say something, too, but when he opened his mouth and simply gaped at her, she knew whatever it was couldn't be good. Was she honestly that repulsive to him?

Minako, oblivious, continued. "And the way he was staring at you all through lunch? Like he wanted to pounce on you or something."

Usagi wished she hadn't seen the very thing Minako was talking about, but his eyes had followed her every move, leaving her confused and hurt and unsure.

"I guess I should consider myself lucky," Usagi managed to get out, her mouth dry. "He's obviously not emotionally stable."

Minako frowned next to her. "I'm not so sure, Usagi…"

But before Usagi had a chance to ask her what she meant, the bell had rung, and their teacher ushered the girls inside the classroom.

End

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know. I know. These idiots are still...well, idiots :D I PROMISE your patience will be rewarded next chapter... :)


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning: You know how this story has been rated M since the beginning? This chapter is why! Nothing too scandalous I promise, but our two lovable idiots definitely lose control in this chapter, so I hope you enjoy it, and please, please, please review for me! I live for your feedback!
> 
> And a HUGE thank you to my dear, sweet friend FloraOne for painstakingly going over and over this chapter to help me make sure it was perfect. 3

Mamoru eyed Usagi suspiciously from his seat across from her, as she sighed for what seemed like the hundredth time. After she had run from him at lunch the day before, he was shocked when she’d shown up at his apartment. The atmosphere between them was tense at best, and he was even more convinced he’d totally blown any chance he might have had with her.

Running frustrated hands through his hair, he decided to try and salvage the situation as best he could. They had been going over the parts of the inner ear for the past half hour, and didn’t seem to be making any headway. Maybe a joke would help? 

“Well, Odango, I see that all this information is going in one ear and out the other.” He groaned inwardly at how incredibly stupid that attempt at a joke had been. But apparently Usagi felt otherwise, as he heard her giggle quietly, a small smile on her face, and some tension releasing from her posture.

Mamoru was relieved at her reaction, but he couldn’t help but be painfully aware of just how close she was to him. He could smell her sweet scent every time she moved to take another item out of her bag. Could almost feel the silky strands of her hair running through his fingers.

He mentally scolded himself for thinking of her that way. For not being able to think about her any other way since she had kissed him. But what he wouldn’t do for a second chance to kiss her, to really show her what it meant to be kissed by someone who not only lusted after you, but loved you. She was so close that he could just pull her into his lap, and… 

Stop it, baka. Think of ANYTHING else. 

The size of his living room had never bothered him before, but he felt almost claustrophobic, now, wanting to get away from her, but move closer at the same time.

They were both seated on the floor of his apartment, books and papers spread out over his coffee table. Since she seemed to be more at ease around him, Mamoru decided to venture onto her upcoming test. He had no idea the subject he was about to choose, would change their relationship forever.

“So...you have a test coming up, right?” he offered lamely.

“Ugh. Why do you always insist on reminding me of such things?” she whined, her head falling to the coffee table with a loud thump.

He smiled fondly at her response. She was so adorable sometimes, it made his heart do funny things in his chest. “Well, considering that’s what your father pays me for, I would think the ‘why’ would be fairly obvious.”   
When she made no move to raise her head or acknowledge him, he scooted over next to her, and nudged her with his elbow, causing her to jump and blush slightly. “Come on, Usa, let’s go over your test material, and we can be done for the day, ok?”

He earned a grunt in reply. “So, what is your test over?” Mamoru asked, flipping through the pages of her textbook. 

Usagi perked up at this question, but her eyes still avoided his. “The physiology of arousal...and the human sexual response cycle,” she couldn’t help her face from blushing a bright crimson.

His eyes practically bugged out of his head. He had somehow managed to block out the fact that he’d learned the same curriculum the year before. “Uh...right,” he stuttered out, “well-let’s start with...a-arousal, I guess.”

Usagi couldn’t help the tingling feeling that began to snake its way up her stomach at his use of the word. “Ok,” she breathed out.

His mouth was dry, as they stared at each other. Why does she have to look at me like that? Mamoru’s mind screamed. How in the world was he supposed to keep his mind away from ravishing her when she was looking at him like that? 

The electricity between them sparked to life in an all too familiar way. In these moments he became so keenly aware of every subtle brush of her fingers against his as the flipped a page in her book. How her skin was like a fine porcelain, smooth and unblemished in its beauty. An involuntary shudder ran through him as he imagined what the smooth skin of her stomach would feel like beneath his hands as he kissed her, drowning in her breathy sighs.

When Usagi noticed his eyes had fallen from her face, she blushed and turned her head. 

Mamoru hated how he never seemed to be able to look her in the eyes, anymore, as his gaze always fell on the supple flesh of her lips, or the rising and falling of her chest...

Grasping for anything that could break the spell they were under, he turned to the only thing he really knew would turn Usagi off; Acadamia. 

“So, can you tell me three things that arousal regulates?” 

Sex, sex and sex, she thought to herself. “Um-I know one is alertness, but I can’t think of the other two, right now.” Because you keep saying “arousal”.

“That’s ok, Usa. You’re right, alertness is one, and the other two are consciousness and attention,” he supplied, noticing that she wasn’t taking any notes, just staring at him with eyes wide, as she licked her lips in anticipation, suggesting she wanted to show him just what “arousal” meant. Think, Mamoru! Think!

“And do you know the names of the neurotransmitters that make up the arousal system?”

She gulped, “N-no, I don’t think I do,” and paused. “Could...you tell me what makes up the arousal system?”

He swallowed nervously. She was trying to kill him. “I suppose I can...there’s five of them: acetylcholine, norepinephrine, dopamine, histamine and serotonin.” 

Ripping his eyes away from her, he reached for her notebook, accidentally brushing his hand against hers. They both took in sharp breaths at the unexpected contact. He mumbled a, “sorry” and began to draw the structures of the neurotransmitters for her. 

She absorbed none of what he was saying. Usagi only watched his lips form the words she had asked to hear. When had science become so...so sexy?

“Usagi? Are you getting any of this?” he asked, a slightly annoyed tone lacing his words.

Snapping out of her reverie, she shook her head in embarrassment. Mamoru noticed this, and his face softened. “Ok, why don’t we go on to the other portion of your test, and we can come back to this later.” He received a nod in response.

Jumping right in, Mamoru asked her the most innocent question he could think of, “Who developed the theory for the human sexual response cycle?”

“Masters and Johnson,” Usagi didn’t hesitate in her answer, as she had paid extra attention in class the past few days, hoping to learn something that she could use with Mamoru.

“Good! That’s exactly right. Can you tell me what the four stages are?”

There was also no hesitation as she answered breathily, “Excitement, plateau,” she paused and stumbled over the next word, “or-orgasm and resolution.”

Mamoru had become completely entranced as she spoke, his eyes watching her lips intently. When he realized she was finished speaking, he looked up at her, startled, a crimson blush on his face.“Yes...and...what are some of the things used to get to the excitement phase?” 

Never breaking eye contact, Usagi began to move toward him with a boldness she didn’t know she possessed, and Minako’s voice in her ear, cheering her on. Her heart was pounding so loudly in her chest she was sure he could hear it, but in one, graceful movement she had lowered herself over him, straddling his legs, hips pressing against him. 

“Maybe...maybe it would be better if I showed you?” As the words left her mouth, she could feel his arousal pressing into her, and she prayed there would be no hesitation from him this time, that he wanted this just as badly as she did. Please want this.

Shock crossed his face, mind racing. Here they were, in the exact same position they’d been before. What was she doing?! Mamoru was convinced he was blushing more than anyone had ever blushed before, but he was oh, so turned on, and he was sure Usagi could feel the proof of that from her position in his lap. He managed to stutter out, “U...U...Usa...wha-?” 

But before he could string a solid sentence together, he noticed her angling her face towards his, her breath tickling his lips, and she spoke, “What does it look like I’m doing?”

And the dam broke. 

Seconds later, she found her mouth moving hungrily against his. Mamoru responded with equal fervor, without hesitation this time, his tongue running the length of her bottom lip, causing her to open her mouth to his advances, as a shudder ran through her, hands threading through the black silk of his hair.

As their kisses grew more frantic, Usagi’s hands slowly started to move down his body, needing to feel more of him. When her hands found his chest, she raked her fingernails over him, enjoying the feel of his tight muscles underneath the shirt he wore, and delighting in his sharp intake of breath as her fingers explored him.

She held her fingers over the top button of his shirt, hesitating only to make sure what she wanted to do was wanted by him, as well. Mamoru groaned into her mouth, and deepened their kiss even further in an attempt to convey just how ok it was. There was no chance he was going to be hesitant this time. After waiting for this for so long, and never dreaming it might possibly happen, he planned on taking everything she had to give him. 

When she was done unbuttoning his shirt, Usagi slid her hands underneath it, the heat of his tanned skin burning into the coolness of hers, and pushed the shirt backwards, freeing him from its confines. Her hands roved over him, trying to soak in every part of him she could. When they settled on the well-defined muscles of his stomach, she grinned at the obvious quiver she felt.

Breaking their kiss briefly to take in the sight before her, Usagi felt excitement grow in places she so desperately wanted him to touch. God, he was gorgeous.

Mamoru couldn’t help but gaze at her heaving chest, breasts pushed out in her efforts to be closer to him. His hands had yet to move from their original position on her hips. She could feel his hesitation, and knew he needed her to tell him to continue. He would never do anything she didn’t want him to, and she loved him for it.

Usagi placed her forehead against his, whispering, “Don’t you dare hold back on me, now.” Not when we’ve come this far.

And in that moment, Mamoru came alive. 

She couldn’t keep up with all the places she felt his hands, and he couldn’t get enough of what she had so freely offered him.

Bending his face in the crook of her neck, his tongue darted out, licking the area where her pulse was rapidly beating, eliciting a wanton groan from Usagi, as she clutched at his chest. Emboldened by her response, he placed his hands on her thighs, bunching up the fabric of her skirt as he ran his hands up and over her skin, causing her to whimper at his touch, marveling at how soft and smooth she was.

His eyes found hers. Sensing his unspoken need to see more of her, Usagi stood up, and quickly removed her skirt and top. Standing before him in a lacy black bra and panties, and not the least bit shy, he pulled her back to him with a growl, unable to bear not kissing her any longer.

Usagi found herself moving her hips against his body, seeking relief from something she couldn’t quite name. What she didn’t realize was that her movements were pushing Mamoru to the breaking point.

His hands continued to run up and down her thighs, lightly grazing the edges of black lace. He’d run one long finger against her wet folds, in the lightest of touches. She whimpered in disappointment every time he came so close to giving her what she so desperately needed. 

Mamoru reveled in the response he was getting from her. Every moan brought a rush of blood down to his groin. He nearly lost all sense of self when he heard her groan out her need, “Mamo-chan...please…”

“What do you need, Usa?” he asked huskily, placing a kiss just above the fabric line of her bra.

“I...I need…” she was unable to form the words, so he gave her the only possible thing that could drive a person to the brink like that. Pushing the fabric of her underwear to the side, he stroked the entire length of her slick folds. Usagi cried out, and collapsed against him in the shock of sudden pleasure, burying her face in the safety of his neck.

“Look into my eyes, Usa,” he murmured into her ear, as he stroked her again, letting a lingering finger slowly trail across her clit.

With another cry of pleasure, her eyes flew to meet his, and she felt the overwhelming need to make him feel the things she was feeling. “Can I...can I touch you?” she managed to say between gasps of pleasure as he continued to stroke her.

Mamoru took her hand and guided it to his belt buckle. She fumbled with it, but smiled in relief when she finally got it undone. Pushing at the top of the jeans he wore, she silently urged him to get rid of the confining fabric, eager to see all of him. 

He stood up, immediately missing the contact of their skin, and hurriedly stepped out of the jeans and boxers he wore. All the breath left Usagi as her eyes hungrily moved over his frame, the evidence of his desire now impossible to miss.

Mamoru sat back down, and pulled Usagi towards him, into the open space of the living room, so there was no chance of her accidentally injuring herself on his coffee table. A grin came to his face at this thought, but was quickly replaced by a look of bliss, as a low growl left his throat when he felt her take his erection into her hand, beginning to run her fingers over him in tantalizing strokes. 

Usagi had no idea what she was doing, relying completely on instinct and his moans to know what drove him crazy. This was completely new territory for her. She had only kissed two boys prior to this. Her first kiss had been in middle school, after she had convinced herself that the boy she had a crush on was going to be her future husband, and the other on a first date in high school that had gone terribly, after which she had no desire to see her date ever again. She felt clumsy in her movements, but smiled as he seemed to be totally lost in pleasure, his eyes unable to hold their focus, especially when she moved her thumb over the tip of him...

Realizing that if Usagi continued, he wouldn’t be able to last another thirty seconds, Mamoru took her tiny hand into his and kissed it lovingly. He kissed her deeply, when he saw the confused look on her face, and lowered her onto her back. 

Her eyes grew wide as Mamoru’s kisses started to trail down her body. Placing his soft, wet lips all over her chest, he cupped her full breast in his hand, thumb running over her nipple through the fabric.

Desperate to feel this contact directly on her skin, Usagi reached around and unhooked her bra, sliding the straps down her arms, leaving her chest bare. 

Mamoru drank in the sight of her. Hair everywhere, eyes glazed over with lust, full breasts rising and falling with her haggard breathing. She was perfect. Stunning. Beautiful. 

Is this really happening? But...how?! His thoughts raced in his mind, trying to keep a grasp on reality.

When she felt that he’d had enough time to look her over, Usagi latched her hands into Mamoru’s hair and lowered his head back down to her chest. 

Taking her hint, he took a nipple into his mouth and began to swirl his tongue around her. She rewarded his efforts with an arch of her back as she cried out. After a few moments, he kissed his way to the neglected breast, repeating his movements from before.

Usagi barely noticed as he began to kiss down her stomach, still shaking from the feeling of his mouth at her breast. But she became very aware of him when his tongue traced the band of her panties.

Instinctively, she lifted her bottom and hips up off the floor, allowing him to remove the last piece of clothing that remained as a barrier between them. Unsure, but hopeful about what was going to happen next, Usagi reached up to brush a few stray strands of hair away from his eyes. 

Looking at her, Mamoru saw complete trust on her face, and any remaining inhibition flew away. Lowering his head between her legs, his tongue reached out to taste her.

Usagi was completely lost in sensation, as his mouth moved over her. She had no idea a person could feel like this. With every touch of his tongue, she felt her entire world center down to one point, as pleasure like she’d never known coiled in her belly. Her hands were buried in his hair, as he ran his tongue over her in long, slow strokes, driving her mad with need. 

Just when she thought she couldn’t take anymore torture, his tongue found her clit, flicking back and forth, back and forth across the bundle of nerves. 

She was on the brink. He could feel it in the way her cries were close to screams, and her breathing was now coming out in gasps and pants. When he knew she was right there, he swirled his tongue across her, as if drawing an eight, and she was gone, tumbling into the most powerful orgasm she’d ever experienced. 

Usagi had explored her own body many times, enjoying what her soft touches could do, but anything she had experienced before paled in comparison to the ecstasy that was coursing through her veins, now.

Calling out his name as her body shook from pleasure, Mamoru moved from his place between her legs so he could pull Usagi close to him as she rode out her climax. He rained kisses all over her face and hair, as she clung to him. 

When her breathing slowed, and feeling had returned to her limbs, Usagi moved out of Mamoru’s embrace, and stood on shaky legs to walk over to her bag. 

“Usa?” he questioned as she rummaged through pockets, obviously looking for something. 

She smiled at him when she had found whatever it was she was looking for, and moved back to sit on her knees in front of him, holding up a foil wrapper. 

Realization dawned on Mamoru’s face as she opened the package. She moved to put the condom on him, and he placed a hand on her wrist, stopping her movements. “Usako, are you sure? We can always-”

“Stop.” 

Mamoru looked up at her in surprise.

“I want this, Mamoru. I have never been more sure of anything in my entire life. I need this, and I’m not turning back, now, unless you want me to.”

He gaped at her, amazed at how confident she was in what was about to happen. Coming out of his shock, he leaned up to kiss her softly. “No. Never,” he replied resolutely.

With a small smile, Usagi turned her attention back to the condom in her hand, She fumbled with it awkwardly, and Mamoru reached out to help her slide it over him. He couldn’t help when his eyes rolled back at the feeling of her hands on him again, biting his lip to keep from crying out.

Usagi laid back down on the floor, spreading her legs in invitation, and he moved between them, both groaning as he came into contact with slick heat.

She reached down, taking his length into her hand and guided him to her opening, willing him to give them what they both needed. 

Mamoru paused, looking deeply into her eyes, begging the question, silently, one more time. When her nod of assurance came, he was unable to hold back any longer, slowly sliding into her, throwing his head back at the sensation of her walls around him. A guttural sound escaped his lips.

He willed himself to go slowly for her benefit, but she had plans of her own as she flexed her muscles around him, and slowly rolled her hips bringing him deeper inside her. That was all the invitation he needed to begin long, quick strokes in and out.

She was surprised to find that having Mamoru repeatedly bury himself inside her didn’t hurt as much as everyone had always claimed a first time would. Usagi had no idea if this was Mamoru’s first time, or if he knew that it was her’s. None of it mattered, though, somehow. Because in that moment, she knew his thoughts were occupied by no one but her.

Usagi watched with clouded eyes at his powerful body moving above her. Her need for him was carnal, and she soon found her legs wrapped around his waist in an effort to bring him even closer to her.

Their movements were unpracticed. Hips bucking out of time, thrusts uneven, unable to slow themselves. But tension had built between them for so long, neither one seemed to care, only seeking to give to the other as much as they were getting.

Usagi could feel from the speed of his thrusts that he was close to his own climax. She couldn’t help the strangled sounds that left her at the occasional brush her clit would feel when he ground into her, causing her own need to grow greater than it ever had before.

Mamoru lost all control, letting pleasure overtake him, as he cried out, her name becoming a prayer on his lips. “U-usako, I...I can’t-I have to…” and she reached up to caress his face, whispering for him to let go. And so he did, coming with a force he hadn’t known was possible, his entire body shaking in release.

Giving her a lingering kiss, he began to mumble apologies for coming without her, “Usa, I’m so sorry, I didn’t mean to do that.” She smiled at the blush that graced his cheeks, and brushed hair from his eyes, a gesture she was growing quite fond of doing, in an effort to reassure him that it was fine. 

But he couldn’t accept her willingness to give up her own pleasure so easily. Unable to help himself, his fingers were once again running up the length of her center, but there was no slowness this time, only a frenzied need to send her over the edge. 

He had purposefully avoided touching her where she needed it the most, and when she began to writhe under his touch, he rubbed her, long and slow, like he’d done the first time. 

As she came, Usagi clutched at Mamoru, needing something to tether her to reality. He collapsed against her, closing his eyes as exhaustion hit. They both felt the weight from the tension of the last six weeks finally leave them, as Mamoru rolled onto his side, pulling her body against his, silently wishing the moment would never end. 

Usagi sighed deeply as she felt Mamoru’s arms encircle her, and she giggled as he nipped playfully at her ear. She turned around in his embrace to face him, and blushed deeply at the intensity of his gaze.

When Mamoru saw her cheeks turn a brilliant shade of pink, he smiled gently, before kissing her forehead, and tucking her underneath his chin in an effort to bring her closer, enjoying the feel of Usagi snuggling against him trying to share in the warmth of his body.

She would occasionally bend her head back to kiss him softly. He would respond to her lips, slowly easing her mouth open beneath his, so that their tongues could melt against each other, both of them seeking not to lose the intimacy of the moment.

The silence between them stretched long and deep, and except for the sounds of Mamoru’s deep breathing and an occasional sigh from Usagi, no other noise was heard in the apartment. 

Words seemed so inadequate after what had just occurred, but no matter how content she was, Usagi wanted, no needed, to know what this meant for them. She finally found the courage to speak, “M-mamoru?”

A sleepy, “Hmm?” was her reply.

“What just happened?” 

His face grew serious as her words filtered through to his brain. “...isn’t it obvious?”

Usagi blushed, and turned her eyes away from him as she stuttered out, “N-no, I...I didn’t mean that. I just wondered...what it...what it meant, I guess?”

Mamoru lifted his hand to brush his thumb across Usagi’s cheek. The gesture caused her to turn her eyes back to his, and he spoke softly, afraid of her answer, “What do you want it to mean, Usa?” 

She shook her head slightly, before breathing out, “I asked you first.”

He kissed her, then, deeply, as if he was afraid his next words would be the end. He was terrified of driving her away. What if she bolted, again, at what he told her? 

Usagi felt the desperation in the kiss, and it frightened her. When he pulled back from her lips, he took in a shuddering breath, his eyes closed as he placed his forehead against hers.

Could he possibly tell her how he really felt? Yes, they had just had passionate sex on the floor of his apartment, but did that mean she loved him? He wasn’t naive enough to assume such things. But surely, he could at least be confident in that fact that she felt something for him. Mamoru could feel it in the way she responded to his touch and kisses against her body. Someone who was completely indifferent towards him wouldn’t have responded as Usagi had.

But even though he was more sure of his love for Usagi than he’d ever been, Mamoru couldn’t bring himself to tell her that. Not yet. It was still too risky. He decided on a half truth, instead, figuring it couldn’t do any damage, “Usa...y-you know I...care for you…”

She recoiled out of his embrace, as if he’d struck her, hurt flashing over her features, as she continued to back away from him. “You care for me? What the hell does that even mean?”

“Usagi...I…we...” and he found himself, once again, unable to voice any kind of coherent thoughts, and as he watched her, Mamoru noticed the tears that had begun to well up in her eyes. His pulse began racing, his brain trying to find some rational explanation for the way she was reacting, “Wha..? Usagi what’s wrong?”

Usagi took in a shaky breath, whispering, “This was a huge mistake. I-I can’t believe I thought you might actually…” she cut herself off, beginning to haphazardly throw her clothes back on.

As he watched her struggle with her skirt, tears freely flowing down her face, now, Mamoru quickly put his boxers and pants back on, going after her as she raced towards the door. 

“Usagi, wait!” he called after her, desperately trying to gain back some control over the situation.

She turned on her heels, eyes blazing with an emotion he didn’t understand, as she hissed out, “Give me one good reason why I shouldn’t walk away from you right now.”

“Usagi...Usa, I told you I care about you...I mean it!” he pleaded, hoping that the sincerity of his words would somehow reach her.

A deep sadness came into her eyes, as she breathlessly replied, “Wrong answer,” slamming the door behind her.


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Are you still with me, dear readers? Have you given up on our idiot teenagers, yet? Well, if you haven't, here's the next installment which will hopefully leave you feeling a little better! Thank you, as always, to the lovely FloraOne for her amazing beta skills, and just friendship in general! The internet is pretty amazing when you can become joined at the hip with someone who lives thousands of miles from you 3
> 
> Pretty, pretty please review for me! It keeps me going, and thank you to everyone who has given me feedback, so far!
> 
> Enjoy!

Usagi stared blankly out her bedroom window, seemingly mesmerized by the trickle of rain drops down the glass. She was vaguely aware of Minako's cheerful chattering in the back of her mind, but nothing comprehensible was registering with her.

They had all taken their turns coming over to comfort her. Makoto, first, with a variety of her favorite sweets, telling Usagi that she need only say the word, and Mamoru would be mince meat. Ami followed, offering soft condolences, and then silently working on school work, her mere presence a comfort. Rei came next with a stiff hug and a huge stack of manga, leaving as quickly as she came. And now, it was Minako's turn, arriving at Usagi's door with a bag full of the latest gossip magazines and pints of ice cream.

This was Usagi's second day staying home from school, unwilling to face the aftermath of her tryst with Mamoru. She had feigned illness, her mother easily believing her, since Usagi was so rarely sick. And so, she'd fitfully slept, dreams of his smiling face taunting her. And in her waking hours, she alternated between inconsolable tears and punching her pillow, eager to release some of the anger she felt.

"...don't you think, Usagi-chan?" Minako asked, as her voice finally reached Usagi's mind.

"Uh...well. What were you saying, again?" Usagi stumbled out, sheepishly.

With a sigh, Minako placed her magazine on the floor, and moved to sit in front of Usagi on her bed. When the two made eye contact, Usagi looked away quickly after seeing the deep concern in her friend's eyes.

"Usagi, would you please talk to me? I'm really worried about you."

"Mina, I just...I just don't know, anymore," Usagi said with a shaky breath.

Minako's eyebrows furrowed. "What do you mean?'

"I was so sure when we had sex that he felt something for me, the way he kissed me and touched me. He even called me, 'Usako.' But afterwards, all the could manage to say was that he cared for me. And even that was a struggle to get out. Who would call me 'Usako' if they didn't have feelings for me? He's such an ass..." Usagi was trying desperately to keep her emotions in check, picking at an imaginary piece of lint on her blanket.

"You'd be amazed at what comes out of people's mouths during sex, Usagi-chan. That overwhelming desire clouds everything, sometimes," Minako told her, sighing heavily.

Usagi visibly blanched at Minako's words. "Yeah...I'm sure that's all it was, now," she said, defeat seeping into her tone. "But he cares for me? Honestly, who says that?" tears were flowing freely down Usagi's cheeks, now, but anger had begun to creep in, "He might as well have slapped me in the face."

When Minako remained silent, Usagi continued, "I've never felt so hopeless, Mina. I know it's silly. M-Mamoru," she struggled to say his name, "is just a boy. I shouldn't be so depressed about it, but he didn't feel like just a boy. He felt like...everything. I love him. And he cares for me. Whatever the hell that means." With this, she fell back against her pillows, hoping to be able to hide in them forever.

"But Usagi," Minako began, "what if that's what he really means? That he does care for you? I know it's not love, but it's something."

From amidst her pillows, Usagi shot her a glare, as if daring Minako to defy her, again. Holding her hands up in defeat, Minako supplied weakly, "Alright, alright. You would know better than me. He's obviously an ass."

"Thank you," Usagi bit out with a curt nod in affirmation of Minako's agreement.

Silence held between the pair for a brief moment before Minako hesitantly asked, "So, Usagi-chan, how long do you plan on running away from this….situation?" At Usagi's renewed glare, Minako back peddled slightly, "I mean, not that there's anything wrong with hiding away. It's just…inquiring minds want to know."

Usagi was, once again, staring out the window at the rain, mumbling, "When I die or the apocalypse happens. Whichever comes first."

Minako scoffed at this. "Don't be so dramatic, Usagi."

"Pot calling the kettle black," Usagi mumbled after staring at Minako incredulously for a moment. "Mina, I'm not being dramatic. I can't go back to that school. I'll transfer somewhere else or something. I don't care where, just anywhere other than Juuban."

Minako gasped, "What do you mean transfer?! You can't! Who will take all those make-up tests with me?!"

Usagi rolled her eyes, "Minako, you fail the tests with me, you can fail them without me, too."

Minako thought for a moment, a quizzical look on her face, before shaking her head and practically yelling, "Whatever! That's still not the point, and you know it." When Usagi refused to meet her eyes, Minako continued, "You can't keep running from this, Usagi-chan. I said it to you the other day, and I'll say it again, now, you're so much stronger than this."

Looking at her with fresh tears spilling out, Usagi questioned, "Am I, Mina? Because I'm not so sure, anymore."

She was startled when she felt Minako take her face between her hands, forcing Usagi to look at her. "Yes, Tsukino Usagi. You are. You are the strongest person I know. You are full of life and love and you will get past this. But not until you face it."

Usagi sighed deeply. "Has Mamoru been there?"

A smirk lifted the corners of Minako's mouth. "Yes. And you'll be delighted to know, he looks absolutely miserable."

A slight smile graced Usagi's face in response to the news, as new resolve filled her. If he could manage to show his face, so could she. She couldn't, wouldn't, let him win. "Okay. Maybe, I'll think about coming back, tomorrow. But I swear to God, Mina, if you leave my side for a second…"

Minako squeezed Usagi's hands in reassurance. "I'll be right there with you, every step of the way. I promise. And if that ass tries to come anywhere near you, I will make sure he's never able to procreate," she said with a wink, before going on, "But why don't you take one more day to wallow, and then you'll have the weekend, too. I need you in amazing form when you come back. I'll even supply the ice cream for the next few days."

"You're the best, Mina-P," Usagi said, as a sweet giggle escaped her mouth. "Now, hand over that Cosmo, please."

oOo

"Sorry," Mamoru mumbled after bumping into a woman he hadn't noticed, his eyes cast downward, forcing his feet to keep moving, barely caring enough to hold up his umbrella as a shield from the rain.

Rei had called him the day before, demanding they meet on Thursday, instead of their usual Saturday 'date.' She had sounded livid, and he didn't even have to wonder why. She had obviously spoken to Usagi, and knew exactly what had transpired. And now, he felt as if he were on his way to his own execution.

The past two days had been miserable for him. Completely, totally, hopelessly miserable. Mamoru had wanted nothing more than to hole himself up in his apartment, and become a hermit. Only venturing out when it was completely necessary. But, he'd reasoned with himself, school was the best distraction he had. Burying himself in academics had always provided solace before, surely it wouldn't fail him, now.

And it didn't, to an extent. Only falling short in the hundreds of daily reminders the school building brought of her. Her locker, the bench she usually sat on outside, her gaggle of friends…

There was one thing missing from all his reminiscing, however. One very important thing. Usagi, herself. She had been absent from school the past two days, and again, he didn't have to wonder why.

He had majorly fucked up.

Bedding her, or in their case, he guessed it would be called 'flooring' her, and then telling her he simply cared. The look on her face, as if he had struck her, haunted him. If he had only had the guts to tell her how he really felt, he was sure he wouldn't be in the position he was in.

Looking back on the moment, now, it was obvious that, despite what he'd believed for more than a year, Usagi had definite feelings for him. To what extent, he wasn't sure, but there was something there. And he had, quite possibly, ruined it for good. He had blown his one chance with the girl he was madly in love with.

As he entered the small cafe where he always got coffee with Rei, Mamoru spotted her almost immediately, eyes boring into him, arms crossed against her chest, and her foot tapping impatiently. He visibly gulped.

Walking over to her, as slowly as he could without drawing even more attention to himself, Mamoru fought back the urge to turn and flee. Might as well get this over with now, he mentally chided himself.

Sliding into the chair across from her, he ran a nervous hand through his hair. The two sat in silence until both had a cup of steaming coffee in front of them, Rei spoke first.

"I assume you know why I asked to meet you, today?" she asked, not looking at him as she slowly and deliberately stirred sugar into her coffee.

Mamoru did his best to hide the immense sadness that was welling up inside him. Did Rei not realize that no one was harder on him than his own self? "Listen, Rei…"

"No," she interrupted him, "It's my turn to talk, Mamoru-baka, and you're going to keep your mouth shut until I'm finished." Mamoru's mouth snapped shut, offended at her treating him like a child, but still frightened of her nonetheless.

"Do you have any idea what you've done?" she hissed at him. When Mamoru began to answer her, Rei held up her hand to stop him, "Uh uh, no talking until I'm done, remember?"

He leaned back in his chair, crossing his arms in a mimic of her posture. With a sigh and a roll of his eyes, Mamoru fell silent.

"Do you idiot males ever think with anything besides your hormones? I can't believe you had sex with Usagi, Mamoru. That's a new low, even for you."

Mamoru's eyes widened at her comment, hurt that one of his closest friends thought so lowly of him, but he didn't have time to process his thoughts as Rei continued, "I know you're probably thinking that I'm upset about this because you slept with my best friend, and you and I used to date. But let me be the first to inform you, that that couldn't be farther from the truth. I'm upset with you because you STILL refuse to admit your feelings. You could have had everything you ever wanted, and you threw it away because you're afraid."

She was looking at him as if she could see into his soul, and he couldn't help the shiver that ran down his spine, but this was soon replaced with anger, "What are you talking…"

"You know damn well what I'm talking about Mamoru. I know you're an incredibly intelligent person, but you insult my intelligence by continuing to pretend like you have no idea what's going on. You are in love with Usagi. You know it. I know it. Hell, even Grandpa knows. So, cut the crap and be honest with me for once."

"H-how did you...how did you know that?" he said in a low voice, fear gripping him at being so easily read.

Rei let out a sarcastic, biting laugh, "Do you have any idea why I broke up with you, Mamoru?"

Confusion made its way onto his face, "You said it was because you only loved me like a brother. That…"

Another laugh interrupted him, "While that is partly true, It wasn't the main reason." When the confusion didn't leave his face, Rei kept going, "I broke up with you, because I knew, even then, that you were in love with Usagi, but that you were too nice of a guy to break up with me because of it. That you would do your best to forget her and be faithful to me."

Mamoru sighed, leaning his elbows on the table and burying his head in his hands, trying to quell the anger that continued to rise up in him.

"And it seems I wasn't wrong in my assessment," Rei said.

His head snapped up at this, unable to hold back any longer. "Would you like a medal, Rei? A public announcement that you were right?" he snapped at her. "Yes. Yes, I am in love with Usagi. Congratulations. You probably realized it before I did! And let me be the first to thank you for your sacrifice. For bullshitting me, to my face, about why you broke up with me. You're a true friend."

Mamoru knew he was just lashing out in anger, but it was the only leg he had to stand on at the moment, his insides so mixed up and confused that he didn't really care who he hurt.

Rei's expression remained stoic during his childish tirade. "Are you quite finished?" The only response she received was a glare. "Good, now you listen, and you listen good, Chiba Mamoru. You are going to fix this. Soon. I don't care if you have to get down on your knees and beg for Usagi's forgiveness, but you are going to fix this."

He felt some of the fight leave his body, sadness beginning to replace the overwhelming anger. "But how, Rei? I don't even...I can't…." he struggled to find the right words, "I know she feels something for me, but after what I did...what I couldn't manage to say, there's no way she would still want me."

"God, you really are an idiot," her voice rising to what Mamoru felt were dangerous levels. "Usagi feels 'something' for you? She's IN LOVE with you, you baka! Probably for just as long as you've been in love with her!" she was practically yelling at him, now, and he was embarrassed to find the majority of the cafe customers staring at them.

"Geez, keep it down, Rei," he hissed at her through clenched teeth.

A sardonic grin curled at her lips, "That, right there, is your problem, Mamoru. You shouldn't be ashamed that you love someone, least of all, Usagi. You should want to shout it to the world. That you love an incredible girl, and for some reason, that none of us have been able to figure out, she loves you back, just as deeply."

A choked sound left his lips, emotions becoming too much to handle, as Rei took his hand gently, a gesture he wasn't sure she was capable of after all the anger she'd thrown at him.

"Mamoru," she started, "I know you think you've messed this up beyond repair, but please believe me when I tell you that's not true. Usagi loves you, I'm sure of it, and I'm also sure that she is one of the most forgiving people in the world. Talk to her. I promise you, you can make it right."

Bringing his endless blue eyes up to meet her violet ones, he began to let himself hope. "Do you really think so?"

"Would I be here, yelling at you and risking getting banned from our favorite coffee shop, if I didn't think so?" she asked, grinning at him.

He smiled back, genuinely, "No. No, I guess you wouldn't be."

Mamoru felt Rei squeeze the hand she still held. "If you've never trusted me with anything else, please trust me on this, Mamoru. You and Usagi are my closest friends, and I refuse to watch the two of you throw away happiness because of a bunch of misunderstandings."

"You really are an extraordinary girl, Rei," he said in a soft, almost reverent voice.

"I know this. And I will be reminding you of that fact on a daily basis once this is all over," she said, winking at him. "Now, where is the waitress? You owe me a piece of cake."

He laughed, outright, at this, "If this works out..." he paused as she raised her eyebrows at him, "...sorry, when this works out, I'll owe you a lot more than cake, Rei."

Mamoru felt lifted, a deep sigh leaving him, but despite Rei's reassurance that Usagi loved him, he couldn't shake the terror he felt at the prospect of facing her. How did one ask for forgiveness for such a thing? After all, Usagi had skipped school to avoid facing him, this couldn't possibly be as easy as Rei was making it out to be.

"How is she? Usagi? Have you seen her, today?"

Rei smiled softly at his concern for her friend. "She's...about as good as can be expected. We've all taken turns being with her. I believe it was Minako's turn, tonight, so after a few pints of ice cream and a good cry, Usagi will be alright." At his sigh of relief, she added, "I mean, they might be planning your demise, as we speak, but you'll be okay."

Her words did nothing to calm the storm that was raging inside him, "You're not going to tell her about this...are you?" His question was greeted with a dramatic roll of her eyes.

"Good god, no! I'm just the messenger, the rest is on you, pal," she said, pausing for a second before continuing, "but if you screw this up, again, I promise you, she'll know about this before you can even begin to realize how fucked you are."

An exasperated sigh left him, as he ran hands through his hair, yet again, a million thoughts beginning to swirl in his mind on just how he was going to confront Usagi.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> To be continued...only one more chapter left, and possibly an epilogue, but we're getting close to the end, either way!


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, here you are, my darlings! The last chapter of my little baby is here! Thank you all so much for going on this ride with me, and I appreciate your love and feedback SO, SO much!
> 
> Also, a huge, huge, HUGE thank you to my sweetest friend, FloraOne for all her help with this. She makes everything I write better with her amazing beta skills! And, she writes amazing fanfic, as well, so you should go check her out 3 Oh! And we're both on Tumblr under these names, too, so stop in and say, "Hi!"
> 
> Enjoy!

Usagi cursed under her breath, hands visibly shaking as she pulled on the door handle to walk into the Juuban High School. She instantly regretted asking Minako to walk her to school when Mina held tightly to Usagi's arm, thwarting any chance of escape back to the safety of her bedroom.

She wasn't ready for this. There was no chance in hell she was ready for this, the mere thought of Mamoru making her knees wobble dangerously. Usagi could hide most of the day, but there was no escaping him during lunch. If he was there, she would see him and those deep ocean colored eyes, his soft ebony hair falling haphazardly into his eyes, lips curving up into a knowing smile…

Even when she was furious at him, Usagi was still caught under his spell. And she wanted to punch him for it.

Usagi usually had trouble paying attention in class, but today, she didn't even bother to try, instead choosing to stare longingly out the window, watching the rain, and praying she might blend in with the wall, so her teachers wouldn't notice her. Either it worked, or she looked too pathetic to bother, as the usual pestering she received was absent that day.

Her heart clenched painfully as she noticed there were only a few minutes left until the lunch bell rang.

That she loved Mamoru was certain. Loved him deeply, and without condition, the latest catastrophe in their relationship not causing her love to lessen in the slightest. But she was hurt, and it was difficult to not blame him for her current predicament.

Yes, she loved him, but Usagi had never received any indication that Mamoru might feel the same way. He had teased her, relentlessly for more than a year, never even bothering to call her by name.

Then, when she had begun to really spend time with him, got to see how sweet and kind he was underneath his gorgeous, cool exterior, Usagi had finally realized the depths of her feelings towards him, but again, Mamoru didn't seem to return them. Sure, he didn't hate her or anything, but love? Yeah, right.

Both times Usagi had allowed herself to be most vulnerable around him, he had hesitated. First when she had kissed him, and then after they had sex…

She had tried to do the mature thing, asking him what it had all meant for them. She had put herself out there, when he didn't seem like he was going to make the move to figure things out. And she had paid the price for it. Mamoru hurt her more deeply than she knew was possible.

Tears rushed to the surface, and Usagi bit her lip to keep them from falling down her cheeks. Stop it, baka. You can't let him see you like this! she yelled at herself mentally.

The bell rang.

Shit, shit, shit, shit, shit.

Usagi had no idea how she'd made it from her class to the cafeteria. All she remembered was that suddenly, he was there. Mamoru. Sitting at a table chatting with friends, as if nothing was wrong in the world. As if he nothing could bother him.

Stopping dead in her tracks, Usagi stared openly at him, not daring to move any closer.

God, she'd missed him. Missed his smile, his clean scent, his long fingers turning the pages of her textbooks, the low tone of his voice as he carefully explained her homework to her...the list was endless. She loved everything about him.

Unwittingly, the corners of her mouth turned slightly upwards in a tiny grin. Until she came crashing back down to Earth, remembering that she was nothing more than a mistake to him. Another girl in what would assuredly be a long list of women.

This thought caused her resolve to not ever allow Mamoru to see her upset to become solid, once again. Holding her head high, Usagi began to walk through the cafeteria, towards the shelter of her friends. But halfway there, she was stopped by the friendly voice of Asanuma.

"Usagi! Over here!"

oOo

Mamoru froze at the sound of Asanuma's voice, terror beginning to seize him. She's here… his mind screamed. Slowly, he turned his head towards the direction of Asanuma's wave, and the sight that greeted him took his breath away.

She was, indeed, there, and despite the countless times he had seen Usagi, he couldn't help but be struck by her beauty. She was the picture of calm as she walked towards them. But Mamoru did notice that, despite her excellent act, her hands were clenched at her sides and her eyes darted around nervously, as if looking for an escape.

He wasn't ready for this. There was no chance in hell he was ready for this. Yes, he had every intention of confessing his feelings and begging Usagi for forgiveness, but this was going to need careful planning! It was a delicate situation at best, and deserved more thought than a chance encounter at lunch time. But before he knew it, she was upon them, sitting down gracefully across from Asanuma.

"Hey, there Usagi! It's nice to see you back at school!"

"Thank you, Asanuma. It's good to be back." Mamoru remained silent as she spoke, noticing the slight quiver in her voice. He prayed his younger friend would continue onto another topic of conversation, but he should have known better.

"Where've you been? Is everything alright?"

Mamoru held his breath, daring for the first time to look at her since she'd sat down. He wasn't surprised to see Usagi looking at him, her eyes darting away when he glanced up.

"Oh, no. I'm perfectly fine. I was just sick, not a big deal at all," she said, punctuating the last words, as she boldly looked at him.

Mamoru held her gaze, unmoving, annoyance beginning to grow inside him at Usagi's obvious attempt to play down what had happened between them.

Oblivious to the exchange, Asanuma kept on, "Man, that's no fun. Was it serious? You were gone for awhile."

He steeled himself for her next answer, as she turned her attention back to Asanuma. "Nope. Nothing serious. Just one of those annoying bugs that hits you out of nowhere, and it takes a few days to shake off," she replied a sad little smile on her lips.

Mamoru was seething, now. Usagi was trying to get a rise out of him, and it was working all too well. He clenched his teeth as she continued, "But thankfully, I have such wonderful friends who love me and take such great care of me."

Before he knew what he was doing, Mamoru pounded his fist on the table, angrily. She had gone too far with that last comment, and he had no patience left after the last week. Careful planning and delicacy be damned.

"Are you kidding me?" he growled out at her.

"What's the matter, Mamoru-baka? Did I strike a nerve somehow?" Usagi bit back, glaring, a sadness in her eyes, as she leaned forward slightly, taunting him.

"You know damn well what you're doing, Odango Atama." Mamoru hadn't meant to get so angry, but he needed her to understand, and the only way he could think of reaching her was the shouting match they were about to embark on. "I'm not going to let you sit there, and throw veiled insults at me, while you pretend nothing happened," he said, his voice starting to rise.

Half the cafeteria was staring at them, now, a mixture of shock and excitement on their faces. Asanuma sat frozen to his seat, never having seen his beloved Mamoru-senpai lose his cool, but Mamoru didn't care, his thoughts only focused on one thing. Usagi.

As he waited for her to speak, he noticed the sadness gone from her eyes, replaced now with anger, a deep red beginning to rise on her cheeks. "Don't act like you have no idea why I would do that, you jerk!" she shouted at him, "You led me on! Played with my feelings, made me like you, and then when you had what you wanted you tossed me away!"

When she turned on her heels, and began to storm away, Mamoru followed her, unwilling to let this, to let her, go. "I did no such thing! You didn't even let me explain myself before you just assumed you knew what had happened!" He was yelling, now, as he found himself following her out of the cafeteria and down the narrow hallway that led to the courtyard.

Usagi whirled around on him right before reaching the courtyard doors. "What did you expect me to do? Wait around for you to realize you had something great in front of you? You rejected me, Mamoru! You hurt me!" she ground out, quickly turning back around to head out into the rain.

Movings swiftly after her, barely missing being hit in the face by the door she'd dropped on him, Mamoru countered, incredulously, voice raised to be heard above the rain,"Rejected you?! What on Earth are you talking about? I never rejected you!"

"Bullshit you didn't!" she practically screamed, hair whipping him in the chest as she turned to stomp off, again, completely ignoring the large contingency of students that had followed them, and now were pressed against any window they could find that might offer a glimpse of the fighting couple.

Mindlessly, Mamoru followed her, pleading,"Usagi, stop it!"

"No! No, no, no, no, no!" She turned, marching up to him, and bringing herself up to her full height, as if it could intimidate him.

"God, you're such a child!" he yelled, exasperated, running hands through his now soaked hair.

"And you're an ass! So, I guess we're even!"

"Oh, real mature, Odango! Maybe I should tutor you in how to GROW UP!"

Mamoru didn't miss the hurt that flashed across her features, as a bitter laugh rang out, "And why would that be, Mamoru? Because you care?"

He paused for a moment, letting the rain wash over them, before he softly replied, the fight suddenly leaving him, "No, because I love you."

Usagi's eyes grew impossibly wide, her breathing seemingly stopped in shock at his words. Water streamed down her face, hair drooping from the weight of the rain, her eyes blinking slowly. Her mouth opened, as if to speak, but no sound came out. When she finally found her voice, her words came out in a squeak. "Wh-what did you say?"

Mamoru's mind was racing, his heart beating so loudly, he was certain Usagi could hear it. He was sure, if they hadn't been standing in the rain, his palms would have been sweaty with nervousness. But he couldn't give into that fear. Fear had gotten him in this mess to begin with, and he wasn't about to make the same mistake twice. Reaching his hands up to cup her face gently, running his thumbs across her cheeks, he said, again, "I love you, Usagi."

"N-no. No, you can't. You...you said you cared about me. You still like Rei," Usagi replied, shaking her head in denial, eyes darting away from his as if she were afraid of what she might find there.

"Usako, please, look at me," he pleaded, as she slowly turned her gaze to his. "I love you. I'm so, so sorry. I...I didn't think you felt the same. I know I've messed up. Badly. But I just need you to know."

Usagi was still blinking slowly, confusion still etched on her face, as she practically whispered, "For how long?"

Sheepishly, Mamoru shrugged his shoulders, hands still cupping her face, a small smile on his lips. "How long have I loved you? Practically since I met you. But when I finally admitted it to myself? Well...a year."

She pulled back from him slightly in shock as his words slowly sank in, "A YEAR?! Chiba Mamoru how on-" Usagi began, but was silenced by Mamoru's lips moving sweetly on hers.

He hadn't meant to cut her off like that, but she was so adorable when she got flustered, he had to kiss her in that moment. He, Mamoru, had to kiss her, Usagi. It was the first time he'd had the guts to initiate a kiss with her, and he supposed it was about damn time he did.

This kiss wasn't like the others they had shared, however. Every kiss before had been laced with blind, overwhelming desire, but this one, this one was everything Mamoru had always hoped it would be. Soft and deep, pouring his love for her into every brush of his lips against hers.

He was confused and disappointed when she suddenly pulled back from him, immediately missing her warmth. "Usako, what's wr-" It was his turn to be cut off.

"Seriously, Mamoru? A YEAR? How could you not tell me? Why did you-?"

Mamoru was beginning to enjoy this game of theirs, as his lips were, once again, on hers, attempting to convey just how sorry his was for keeping such a thing from her for so long.

When they finally broke apart, he touched his forehead to hers, needing to remain close to her. And Mamoru was incredibly pleased to find a look of complete contentment and bliss on Usagi's face, a smile creeping its way onto her mouth, as she breathed out, "Mamo-chan," he smiled at the nickname, "I love you."

Kissing her briefly, one last time, Mamoru pulled away, offering his hand to her, and she took it with a giggle. "You know, Usako," he began as they walked back toward the building, that obnoxious smirk on his face, "I think I need to cut you off more often. It definitely has its advantages." He winked at her, and was rewarded with a dramatic roll of her eyes.

"Have I mentioned that you're an ass?"

"Quite a few times, if my memory serves me right," he replied matter of factly.

She leaned up and kissed his cheek, "Well, at least, now, you're my ass."

He gave her a knowing smirk, as they reached the doors back into the school, where they were greeted with raucous cheers and dozens of iPhone cameras.

A brief moment of terror struck Mamoru, as he wondered just how long it would be before Kenji stumbled upon this video in the dark corners of the internet, but as he looked down at a beaming Usagi, he decided he could live with the constant threats of death and castration that would surely be coming his way. There were very few physical maladies he couldn't pay to fix if the need arose, and besides, he finally had the girl. What else could possibly matter?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Awww look, the little babies finally figured it out <3 let me know what you think, and stay tuned for the epilogue!


	9. Epilogue

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> First off, I can't thank you all enough for your love and reviews on this little baby of mine. It's been a labor of love, but I'm incredibly happy with how it turned out!
> 
> I cannot thank my sweet friend FloraOne enough for her constant support and help during the writing process of all my stories. She's a huge blessing, and I owe her more than she knows 3
> 
> I hope you enjoy this sweet epilogue, and that you'll miss these sweet, idiot babies as much as I will!

"Mamo-channnnn!" Usagi called out, as she entered his apartment with the key Mamoru had given her a few weeks before. He sat on the couch, reading glasses perched precariously on his nose, reading one of the thickest books Usagi had ever seen.

Much to her chagrin, he removed the glasses and laid the book on his coffee table, making his way towards her in long, graceful strides. And when he smiled at her, Usagi felt that all too familiar flutter in her chest.

They had been together for nearly two months, after what was now affectionately called, "The Fight." And while the rest of the student body had yet to cease talking about it, Usagi and Mamoru hadn't looked back since.

Usagi was blissfully happy. Obnoxious, googly eyed, honeymoon phase, over the moon happy. It still amazed her how easily they fit into each other's lives, as if it had always been that way, and she couldn't get enough of it. Mamoru was more than she ever could have hoped he would be, and he insisted, on a daily basis, that she was the same to him. She had a sneaking suspicion that, while he meant it wholeheartedly, he only repeated it so frequently because of the reaction it elicited from her, which often included her throwing herself into his arms and kissing him senseless.

Mamoru had also said he was especially fond of her giggle, which she couldn't help herself from doing as he reached her, picking her up and swinging her around, his usual smirk on his lips.

Usagi continued to laugh as he put her down, placing his forehead against hers, kissing her nose. There was a teasing lilt to his voice as he spoke, "I was going to lecture you about being late, Usako, but since you look so beautiful, today, I'll let it slide."

"Oh, you will, will you?" Usagi replied, one eyebrow raised in question.

"Indeed. I am completely entranced by your feminine wiles," he told her, huskily, breath tickling her face.

Unable to resist any longer, Usagi leaned in to kiss him, but her eyes snapped open when she felt his long finger on her lips. She was about to protest when he spoke, with a shake of his head, smirk still firmly intact, "Not so fast, Odango. We need to study first." And before she could blink, he had extracted himself from her embrace, and was heading back towards his coffee table.

Usagi pouted, as she followed him, unceremoniously plopping herself down on the floor next to Mamoru. "You're such a tease, Mamo-chan."

"Oh, you're one to talk, Little Miss Mini-skirt," he said, tugging teasingly at the hem of her skirt and winking at her.

With a roll of her eyes, Usagi began to pull books out of her bag. This was the one complaint, if one could truly call it that, that she had about their relationship. Mamoru insisted that they keep their tutoring sessions in tact, and anytime she came over to his apartment on a school night, he forced her to study before he'd even entertain the thought of...other more pleasurable activities. But, she'd reasoned with herself, any time she got to spend with him was worth whatever form of torture, even studying.

"Want me to put some music on?" Mamoru asked, knowing she focused better when there was some form of noise filling the space.

"Yes, please!"

Before she could get any other requests out, Mamoru had risen, walking over to the stereo system. As he was ruffling through his music, she reached into her bag, once again.

After finding what she'd been looking for, Usagi stood, and asked in a slightly nervous voice, "Hey, Mamo-chan?"

"Hmm?" he replied, not looking up at her.

"Co-could we maybe listen to this?" Usagi held a CD out to him.

Mamoru's face held a curious look, as he moved towards her to take the offered disc. When he took it from her, he froze, recognition dawning in his eyes as he stared down at a picture of his mother.

He was quiet for a moment, his expression unreadable, causing Usagi to wonder if she'd just made a huge mistake in revealing what she knew about his family, or lack thereof.

Relief flooded through her, when he slowly brought his eyes up to meet hers, a look of awe reflected in the endless depths of his eyes.

Usagi became completely confused, as he grabbed her hand and began leading her towards his bedroom.

"Mamo-chan?!" she squeaked out, totally clueless to what he was thinking.

She was even more surprised when he stopped, pulling her into his arms in a flash, lips at her ear as he whispered, "You and I are going to have a hands on anatomy lesson, today, Usako."

Her eyes grew wide, just beginning to process his words, as he bent down, placing his hand under her knees, lifting her up and carrying her towards the bedroom once more.

Usagi giggled, once more, loving the direction this tutoring session was taking, as she asked him, "Do you do this with all your students, Mr. Chiba?"

Mamoru paused in his steps for a moment, a devilish look in his eyes, "No. Just for the short blonde ones with hair shaped like odango."

She grinned. "Ass…"

But any further insult she might have had planned for him was quickly silenced with a thought erasing, mind-blowing kiss. Perhaps, she could learn to love studying after all.

End


End file.
